Sky is falling

 KNOCK AT THE CABIN (2023)

Reviewed by Jerry Saravia

Let it be said: the last time that M. Night Shyamalan directed an apocalyptic tale, it was a sign of an impending cinematic apocalypse. No Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse were needed to foretell that impending disaster called "The Happening" and that was the last Nightman movie I had seen for a while. Until now. Only now the Nightman has chosen to adapt a novel and write it as a gloom-and-doom tale with some shred of optimism. "Knock at the Cabin" is intriguing for a while yet it falls apart towards its climax and leaves us with more questions than answers. Normally that would work within the framework of a movie like this but the questions linger and made me wonder why this tale needed to be woven this way.

7-year-old Wen (Kristen Cui) is collecting grasshoppers in a mason jar to study them and see how they react to their environment. Wen is in the middle of the woods near a cabin when she spots a huge figure in the background walking towards her. He is Leonard (Dave Bautista), a kind and gentle man who explains to Wen that he is on a mission and has to save the world. Before Wen can question Leonard's odd mission, three other people materialize out of the woods with makeshift weapons. Wen runs to her two adopted dads at the cabin, Eric (Jonathan Groff) and Andrew (Ben Aldridge), and suddenly we think this is a home invasion. Or maybe these strange people emerging from the woods are bigots who feel same-sex couples are ruining our world. Let it be said that I did not expect these four people to be pontificating about an end of the world scenario where someone from the chosen small family unit needs to be sacrificed to save it. Will the disbelieving Eric or Andrew sacrifice Wen or themselves? Only one need be sacrificed, but why this family? Apparently Eric, Andrew and Wen show more purity and love for each other than anyone else on Planet Earth. But would anyone that pure of heart and mind really sacrifice one of their own for something seemingly unprovable? 

The other members of this Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse are a nurse, Sabrina (Nikki Amuka-Bird); an ex-convict named Redmond (former Harry Potter actor Rupert Grint showing major grit), and a slightly delirious cook who loves to feed people, Adriane (Abby Quinn). Each one asks the two dads, now bound with rope, to please consider sacrificing someone in their family to save 7 billion people! Each time one of the Four Doofuses are denied, they have to kneel, put a cloth over their heads and be bludgeoned to death by the others! Huh? Then to further prove their apocalyptic claims are true, news footage is shown on TV of tsunamis and planes falling from the sky. End of the World or some sort of clever sleight of hand? Some of the news is prerecorded, and later some of it is live. 

"Knock in the Cabin" still sort of held my interest for a while but once the plot was unraveled, I just couldn't buy it at all. The story is based on a 2018 novel by Paul G. Tremblay titled "The Cabin at the End of the World" and, though the novel is darker and more ambiguous, the story is relatively the same with changes in who survives and who dies. Director Shyamalan edges this story with very little suspense during some crucial scenes, and credibility is thrown out the window when the rules, despite being purportedly exacting visions, don't mesh with the storyline. Why would the downfall of humanity be centered on some log cabin in the middle of the woods? Why this particular couple? Why is murder a method of salvation? Shall I page Abraham from the Bible to find the answers? In Abraham's case, God merely tested the old man's obedience to the Lord. I suppose it is all Biblical at the end of the day but it doesn't jell in this movie and feels too heavily contrived, despite some urgency provided by Dave Bautista (he is becoming one hell of a character actor). All that urgency though is all for naught. God just doesn't figure in this apocalyptic equation.

Cliched small-town horror harbors some surprises

 THE VISITOR (2022)

Reviewed by Jerry Saravia

Truly nothing escaped me about what to anticipate in "The Visitor," one of various Blumhouse horror pictures to have emerged as part of the Blumhouse Television and EPIX streaming deal. Almost from the start, I could tell where "The Visitor" was going yet how it got there really held my interest. Okay, a mildly enthused interest but an interest nonetheless. 

A newlywed couple, Robert and Maia, arrive in a small, strange town where the bartender might be a little too friendly, the hardware store owner who is a little baffled by the husband, a local priest who might be a little too holier-than-thou with respect to the Bible, and there is a cliched town historian and so on. It turns out that one of the newlyweds, Robert (Finn Jones), is seeing himself in various paintings in their new home and in other people's homes. Each painting is inscribed with the title, "The Visitor" and some sort of cryptic phrase. It is not a matter of just bearing a similar likeness - Robert looks exactly like this Visitor. Robert's wife, Maia (Jessica McNamee), senses that he's getting paranoid and that it is a result of him continuing to take his anti-anxiety medication. Their history is marred somewhat by the loss of their baby due to a miscarriage. Yet they press on and she eventually gets pregnant and all hell breaks loose involving a snake shedding its skin, frogs, locusts, etc. Nothing here you haven't seen before. 

"The Visitor" is still marginally effective and has a few jump scares that do work (no annoying zither music cues are used to highlight them) but what made the movie work is the decaying atmosphere, thanks to superb lensing by Federico Verardi (who also lensed the scary 2020 thriller "Alone"). There is a distinctly subtle muddy haze to this movie, intended or not, that embellishes the proceedings. The house they stay in doesn't feel safe (it is Maia's childhood home) and other places such as the interiors of an antique shop, the local church or the hardware store have a death-like feel to them. Also adding to the movie's frightful, unexpected conclusion is the solid work of Finn Jones (a face that is hard to forget that reminded me of Jude Law) and Jessica McNamee as the couple and the revelation of their past and future that comes as a real shock.

"The Visitor" starts off as a typical, cliched horror picture about apathetic town residents whose grins are a little too wide and where nothing is what it seems. As I mentioned earlier, the correlation between the paintings and Robert is none too surprising, at first. Once the story is really fleshed out and we arrive at the conclusion that I did not anticipate, I was taken aback. It is a dark, sick, often demonic and unsettling movie. Worth a visit.

Fright Lite

 GOOSEBUMPS (2015)
Reviewed by Jerry Saravia

Just like "Scary Stories To Tell in the Dark" (one of many reasons back in my day to go to the library and read them voraciously), "Goosebumps" stories were mainly for kids about kids involved in none too perilous situations with ghouls, giant insect creatures, werewolves and so on. I don't have any particularly vivid memories of the R.L. Stein's books, some of which I checked out back in the 1990's (possibly a lot to do with my younger brother) but I am sure their thrills, chills and spills came close to this 2015 feature film version. "Goosebumps" the movie is successful at creating humor and mining it out of these creatures that run havoc on a small town and the teen characters doing their best to avoid them.  

A new kid on the block named Zach (Dylan Minnette), living specifically in a small Delaware town, has just moved in with his single mother (Amy Ryan - diverting in every way) who is the new vice principal of her son's high school. Awwkkkward. Meanwhile, there is a mysterious neighbor who is none other than a fictionalized version of R.L. Stine (played with real zeal and perfect pitch by Jack Black). Stine has a 16-year-old daughter, Hannah (Odeya Rush), who is lovestruck by Zach and there is a fairly romantic bit where they visit an abandoned funhouse. Trouble is nigh as Zach assumes Hannah is being held prisoner in her house and he finds out more than he bargained for. There are dozens of locked books written by Stine that once they are unlocked, every monster created in the books, including the Abominable Snowman and Slappy the Dummy, are unleashed and ready to eviscerate the entire town.

"Goosebumps" works best with its appealing, colorfully drawn characters including Jack Black's Stein, who knows his monsters could disrupt and destroy everything in their path; Dylan Minnette's Zach who can't begin to understand what is happening and is a bit of a scaredy cat; Odeya Rush's sweet Hannah who has a secret that may come as a surprise to Stein fans, and the rollicking comic relief of Ryan Lee ("Super 8") as Champ, who scares very easily. 

The monsters in "Goosebumps" are fun for a while yet they are CGI creations and there might be too much time devoted to them. Some of the special-effects in the climax are so overwhelming that you temporarily lose sight or focus of what you are seeing. Still, for Jack Black's fussy and determined RL Stein and its engaging cast, "Goosebumps" will do as an "Evil Dead" for kids. 

Chuck Norris's Best Picture Ever

 CODE OF SILENCE (1985)

Reviewed by Jerry Saravia

It is hard to fathom how many wooden Chuck Norris performances there have been throughout the 1980's. I can't say for sure if he was far more animated in the late 1970's in his karate action pictures but he always possessed some measure of charisma by being resolutely steely-eyed. Norris is not wooden in "Code of Silence" but he isn't very animated either, yet his lack of nuance or facial expressions beyond a steely-eyed look work to his advantage in this entertaining Windy City police actioner. 

Norris is a tough, no-nonsense righteous cop, Sgt. Eddie Cusack, who has not a single blemish on his record. His record is not being put to the test yet his loyalty to the police department and its numerous detectives is. After a disastrous sting operation involving drug dealers from a gang called the Comachos and a rival mob that unexpectedly show up to mow down them down, there is an unfortunate killing of an innocent kid by a grizzled, alcoholic cop, Detective Cragie (Ralph Foody) who plants a gun in the kid's hand. Cragie's younger partner, Kopalas (Joseph Guzaldo), witnesses it and later lies about the incident at a hearing. Meanwhile, Cusack is determined to find the rival mob members - one who skips town has a daughter (Molly Hagan) who might be in danger. The Comachos have their drug lord, Luis Comacho (Henry Silva) whose smile is almost enough to kill you. 

"Code of Silence" refers to the code that cops have - don't sell anyone out for any criminal negligence or unethical violations. At first, I couldn't really buy that Sgt. Cusack would have an unblemished record and not been in the police force long enough to know that sometimes you do take the law into your own hands, ethics be damned. Aside from the hearing and the investigation subplot, nothing in "Code of Silence" is unfamiliar turf. Drug dealers and cop and drug lords, oh my; they had been a staple of dozens of police action thrillers of the 1980's (we won't even get into the ones that went into direct-to-video release). Norris gives it oomph and gets to kick ass with his stunning back kick (the scene at the bar shows him getting pummelled after kicking a few minions, which is far more realistic than most other Norris action pics or Steven Seagal pics). There is also the terrific debut of Dennis Farina as a wounded cop (who was an actual cop at the time) and some nice solid work from Mike Genovese as an angry mafia drug lord named Tony Luna (he looks more like a construction worker but he is still effective). Let's not forget the unsung, authentic Chicagoan Ron Dean as another tough cop who has appeared in "The Package" and "The Fugitive," which were all directed by the same guy, Andrew Davis.  

"Code of Silence" has a rousing finish involving Chuck Norris as a one-man army and the climactic buildup in this standard plot is captivating in its own way. He doesn't perform as many martial-arts fight scenes as in previous films yet he can still make you root for him regardless. I can't forget the inclusion of an armored, computer-voiced police tank called the Prowler that can shoot with great aim and barrel through anything. It just adds more oomph to an already colorful, ably acted if familiar action picture. Easily Chuck Norris' best picture ever. 

Restless L.A. anomie

 FLOUNDERING (1994)

An Appreciation by Jerry Saravia

I was a twentysomething fool, a Generation X-er from the early 90's. X meant the unknown and addressed slackerdom, if that is the word for it. I myself felt aimless and sought something real but had no idea where to look for it. There were various Generation X films during the early 90's from "Bodies, Rest and Motion" to the far-too-polished though diverting "Reality Bites" to the diverting and somehow more mature "Singles" to Kevin Smith's slackers and retail clerks-for-life in the comical "Clerks." Yet it is really Peter McCarthy's "Floundering" that really hit the nail on the head. The search for one's self and some measure of spirituality that is forsaken for just getting it together is the heart and soul of "Floundering" and no better actor captured the 90's X-ers better than James Le Gros. Slacker, possibly, but it clearly draws more insight than expected into such an X-er.  

Le Gros is John Boyz, a single, 30-ish guy living on unemployment and alone in his Venice apartment. The 1992 L.A. riots are in the background, mostly playing on his TV as he fantasizes about the crooked police chief who talks to him through the TV. John fantasizes and daydreams a lot, especially about the woman collecting soda cans for recycling (he imagines that she could run a recycling business and his ideas are fairly sound and practical though forming a business costs money). He has a cheating girlfriend (Lisa Zane, never better) who is nonplussed by John's disapproval especially after catching her having sex with her boss ("We will have dinner...in 3 hours!") John has a paranoid brother (Ethan Hawke, who is spectacularly good) who is in and out of rehab. However, soon John's life gets out of control when the IRS seizes his bank account for unpaid taxes and his unemployment starts to run dry. 

John spends more time fantasizing and he has trouble sleeping, waking up every day at 3 am with doom on his mind. He imagines getting shot in the head. He starts to casually ingest cocaine with an ex-girlfriend (Olivia Barash, who contributes a song to the soundtrack) and smoke crack with neighbors who believe a revolution is imminent. John can shoot the shit with a philosophical buddy (John Cusack) while smoking pot and discussing the steps to actualize spirituality rather than just thinking about it. 

"Floundering" literally flounders from daily episodes of John's life, absorbing the drenching anomie, and again searching for something within himself - to understand himself and move forward. The statewide news is depressing, the people in his life offer support through their own understanding of L.A. and crime and the draining of life itself in this big city, but what can a guy do living his life day to day with no real direction?  Le Gros gets there eventually and I felt a kinship with this nice, nonviolent guy - the 90's archetype of a sensitive, selfless man. "Floundering" has it all and embodies the anomie of society without relishing it or explaining it - it just is. John Boyz knows that too well.   

It Couldn't Be Any More Ordinary

 LASERBLAST (1978)

Reviewed by Jerry Saravia

Roger Corman could knock out a low-budget efficient B-picture in three days and make it a diverting enough romp to warrant a viewing. I am thinking of Corman's "The Raven" with Boris Karloff and Peter Lorre, or "The Terror" with a young Jack Nicholson. The makers of this atrocious, numbingly dull trash called "Laserblast" could have taken a cue from Corman. "Laserblast" has no sense of fun or danger about it - a nonsensical non-movie.

Shot in three weekends, "Laserblast" is about a mind-numbingly dull young man, Billy (Kim Milford) from California, who hates when his mother goes away for several weeks at a time to Acapulco. He drives around in a van barechested and tries to pick up his girlfriend at her house but her grandad (Keenan Wynn), a former military general, will not allow it. I can see why because Billy is completely uninteresting and has nothing of value to say about himself or anyone else (Sample dialogue from Billy's girlfriend: "Gee, Billy... why can't you be more ordinary.") There is a pool party scene which looks about as much as fun as watching somebody watching this movie - the extras look bored. 

Meanwhile, Billy flounders in the desert and finds an alien laser weapon which can be activated by wearing a metal necklace. Pretty soon we see Billy transforming into some green-skinned demented creature who fires the weapon and destroys cars, mailboxes, occasionally people and a Coming Soon billboard for the original "Star Wars"! Maybe for our generation, it should have been a billboard for "Star Wars: The Holiday Special" but never mind. When Billy is not destroying property and people, he is a simple dullard who either has sex with his girlfriend or drives aimlessly around the same California stretch of road. Other than the annoying presence of Eddie Deezen (his film debut) and one-day filming a piece for actors Keenan Wynn and Roddy McDowall as a small-town doctor, nothing in "Laserblast" will merit the slightest interest and that includes the brief appearance of stop-motion animated aliens looking like rejected models for that whining deformed baby in "Eraserhead." A sleep-inducing dud.