Race for the exits!

RACE FOR THE YANKEE ZEPHYR (1981)

Reviewed by Jerry Saravia

For an old-fashioned and eccentric adventure movie, "Race for the Yankee Zephyr" may excite some thrill-seekers but it is an underwhelming and trivial film. It bears the clout for a reasonable action picture with a fine cast and director, and it shortchanges everything that could make it work.

Set in New Zealand, drunk deer hunter Gilbert Carson (Donald Pleasance) inadvertently finds an old World War II DC-3 plane (known as the Yankee Zephyr) rise from the surface of a nearby lake. Helicopter pilot Barney (Ken Wahl - harboring no accent at all) is along for the ride in this precious discovery, although both are unaware that 50 million in cargo is inside the plane. Lesley Ann Warren is Gilbert's daughter, who doesn't have a trace of a New Zealand accent either. Some villains, headed by George Peppard in a delicious performance as a ruthless businessman, are very interested in that grand fortune. How do they find out that the Yankee Zephyr has been discovered in New Zealand? A simple phone call from a local merchant is all that is needed.

"Race for the Yankee Zephyr" has the distinction of having beautiful scenic shots of New Zealand (love the little cabin in the woods that Wahl and Warren frolic in) but little else to distinguish it from any made-for-TV action picture or series ("Tales of the Gold Monkey" is more fun than this picture). Wahl looks disinterested and Lesley Ann Warren looks like she wandered in for the chance to visit New Zealand. Only Donald Pleasance (most of his dialogue is unintelligible) and George Peppard give it a lift above the norm. A boat chase offers mild excitement but somehow director David Hemmings doesn't bring any level of excitement or wonder to anything else in the film. Stick with Indiana Jones or Harry Steele over this stale and indifferent adventure tale.

Drawing blanks

DRAWING FLIES (1996)

Reviewed by Jerry Saravia

Known as the "lost View Askew" film, "Drawing Flies" is one unusual picture. It starts as a Generation-X picture about lost jobs and welfare checks, and slowly segues into a road movie about a search for the Sasquatch creature in the endless wilderness area of British Columbia.

Jason Lee plays Donner, the leader of the group of Generation X slackers who leads them on to this expedition. At first, these slackers mostly sit around all day in their apartment doing absolutely nothing. Getting high, smoking marihuana and collecting unemployment is about all on their minds. Unfortunately, unemployment checks are suddenly running out, as the system cuts them off. They know not what to do. HINT: How about looking for a job? Instead, these slackers think it is cool to just hope their unemployment is reinstated. They go to a party to score beer and get high, but have to pay for admittance. It is at this point that I lost patience since I have seen so many similar films about the exact same situations. Richard Linklater's "Slacker" said it all, and with far more ingenuity and wit than the first twenty minutes of this film. Yes, even appearances by Kevin Smith as Silent Bob (this is View Askew, after all) and Joey Lauren Adams did not take me out of my doldrums.

Finally, a scene arrives where Donner tells his friends to wake up out of their hopeless funk, and go on a camping trip to some log cabin in British Columbia. Donner convinces them to go, riding in a van and with no cash and only the barest of food rations. There are lots of scenes of campfires, beer kegs, a group of diaper-wearing adults, a lot of cussing, Jason Mewes living up to his reputation as, what else, a stoner, and a few one-liners and not much else, I'm afraid.

Most of "Drawing Flies" is vapid nonsense with no reason for its existence. Shot in grainy 16mm black-and-white, directors Malcolm Ingram and Matt Gissing cannot begin to approximate the engaging repartee of their View Askew god, Kevin Smith. At least, Jason Lee shines occasionally, as he shows Donner slowly losing his sanity, as does Renee Humphrey, and there is some of that desperation and ill will for the search for this "Bigfoot" that made me remember "The Blair Witch Project" (though this film was shot much earlier than "Blair"). Outside of that, there is not much here to draw attention.

Clashin' Ramones

END OF THE CENTURY (2003)

Reviewed by Jerry Saravia

After seeing "End of the Century," one might be tempted to nickname the Ramones the Clash. It was certainly a clash of personalities as evidenced by their disparate belief systems and constant temper tantrums. Joey Ramone, the lead singer of the band, was a leftist. Johnny Ramone was a staunch Republican ("God Bless George Bush"). Dee Dee Ramone was on higher ground than anyone else, albeit on a heroin high. Tommy Ramone was the drummer who basically ran their publicity machine. And to this day, the Ramones, the arbiters of punk rock, never got the recognition they deserved.

"End of the Century" begins with the ever-changing music culture in the mid-70's as the disco craze continued and the Osmonds ruled the airwaves. Suddenly, an unexpected explosion of rock erupted from Queens, NY in 1974. This explosion was a band called the Ramones, formed by four musicians from poor neighborhoods wearing matching blue jeans and leather jackets. Their two-minute songs ranged in subjects from, well, rock and roll to sniffing glue to teenage isolation. They were the official begetters of punk rock - a louder, in-your-face form of rock and roll. As seen in some original concert footage from the CBGB's (a dank New York club), they were indeed loud and would often argue on stage about what song to perform. The Ramones were beloved in New York City, England and abroad, and produced 18 studio and live albums (they inspired a movement that included the Clash and the Sex Pistols). The problem was that they failed to create a sensation in America, though they created a mass sensation elsewhere. I remember my years at Jamaica High School where one girl, one girl mind you, spoke highly of the Ramones (and included her appreciation of them in the senior yearbook) - she was vilified for being a fan (not many at Jamaica High School in the late 80's were fans of punk rock).

"End of the Century" features revealing interviews with the band and the different members that came and went in later years. There are tales of the growing animosity and discomfort that developed when Johnny Ramone stole Joey's girlfriend and married her - they stayed as bandmates but the tension was always there (one song they performed, "The KKK Took My Baby Away," even deals with their love triangle). There are also revealing tidbits about CBGB's, the friction with producer Phil Spector holding the band at gunpoint, the cult film "Rock and Roll High School" that prominently featured their music, Dee Dee going solo and producing a truly moronic though energetic rap video, the notion that Joey was never able to talk about the band in press interviews (Johnny was the spokesman), their inspirations such as MC5 and New York Dolls, and much more. Diehard Ramones fans (and rock fans in general) will find plenty of insight into the punk rock scene.

At a little over two hours, "End of the Century" does a cohesive, compelling job of detailing the band's disillusionment with their status (forced to play at clubs rather than arenas through most of their career), the individual personalities of the bandmates, and the music culture that changed with each decade yet they kept their integrity, including their outfits. Compared to most rock documentaries, "End of the Century" has a melancholy tone that considers what might have been since the revolutionary Ramones never reached the mass audience they sought (the fates of some of the band members is just as sad) . The film wants you to feel sore about their lack of mass appeal, and one can't help but wonder why some forms of music, like rap, took off and others hardly raised an eyebrow. Maybe the Ramones were too punk for any generation, too angry. Perhaps a band that was upfront and confrontational was more than any American audience could stand for.

I am a teacher! So sue me!

TEACHERS (1984)

Reviewed by Jerry Saravia

American cinema during the 1980's was not any sort of breakthrough era. Still, even with many films that failed to captivate, something was always being said that seemed to speak from the heart. That is the case with the intrinsically watchable and flawed "Teachers," a satire of the education system with enough memorable scenes and performances to warrant a special viewing.

Nick Nolte, in of his best roles, plays the perfect Nolte blowhard - a teacher with hangovers. Yep, the first words out of his mouth in the morning may as well be, "Awwwww, sh@#!" Anyway, this time, he is a teacher named Alex Jurel. He convinces dates he is a licensed pilot, save for that "Teacher of the Year" plaque (Who keeps such a thing on their kitchen counter?) A typical Monday morning involves more than any teacher could bear (and, yes, even more than the shenanigans at "High School High"). A student bites a teacher. A teacher throws ink at another teacher. The principal is unaware and clueless. A gym teacher has sex with a student (how utterly prescient!) A narc sticks out like a sore thumb. A stern teacher has a class where he never interacts with the students, merely mimeographs his lesson plans. A mental patient pretends to be a substitute. Oh, and Alex teaches his students about how to fix a window with the proper tools. To top it all off, a lawsuit has been filed against the school for graduating an illiterate student. Yes, a typical Monday morning.

As for the lawsuit, Vice Principal Roger Rubell (Judd Hirsch) assures the school superindentent (Lee Grant) that the teachers will claim they had no knowledge of the student's illiteracy despite the student's passing grades. But there is a slight problem - Alex was once a visionary and thought he could make a difference in students' lives. He feels obligated to help a troubled illiterate, Eddie (Ralph Macchio), and this can spell doom for the lawsuit.

I think we can see where "Teachers" is headed. Despite a silly subplot involving a lawyer (Jobeth Williams), a former student of Alex's who falls for him, most of "Teachers" is entertaining and inspiring. As directed by Arthur Hiller, it has enough subtlety and simple, stable camera set-ups to really drive forward the satire. Sometimes, it can get a little heavy-handed but never preachy.

Nolte has never given a bad performance and brings an honesty to the role that eclipses every other actor in the movie. Macchio is not completely credible as a Fonz-like hooligan but he is watchable. Same with the brazen antics of Crispin Glover as another troubled student who plays pranks on every teacher, including stealing their desks! Judd Hirsch lends credibility and unmistakable pathos as a school official who has to play by the rules, and hopes everyone does likewise. Jobeth Williams is not always convincing as the prosecuting lawyer, and her final scene is ridiculous and will leave you chuckling for all the wrong reasons. Major heaps of praise, though, go to Morgan Freeman as the defense lawyer who handles the depositions (before he played a teacher himself in "Lean on Me"), Allen Garfield as the nervous, caffeinated teacher, the late Royal Dano as the inexpressive teacher who suffers a horrible fate, and the priceless Steven Hill as an attorney.

"Teachers" is occasionally melodramatic but never too exaggerated for maximum effect. It teeters between seriousness and comedy and not always smoothly, but it has vitality and strength. The movie leaves you inspired in the hopes that a teacher can make a difference after all.

Resolve and Shop

W. (2008)

Reviewed by Jerry Saravia

Oliver Stone's "W." is his least angry film to date. The reason I say "least angry" is because if nothing else, the country grew to be angrily anti-Bush since the Iraq War began (in fact, this country might be angrier than Stone in the last eight years). Bush has been seen as a warmonger and an unintelligent dullard who couldn't speak in complete sentences, couldn't give an interview worth a damn, and was contradicting himself from one day to the next in all of his press conferences (he once told an interviewer that he felt the war in terror couldn't be won, and then the Republicans came out saying he didn't mean it). I think few can argue with Bush's lack of presence of mind and, as protracted and silly as some elements of the film are, "W." is occasionally a breathless bio of Dubya, though nowhere near as powerful or incendiary as Stone's own "Nixon," easily one of the great political biographies ever.

Josh Brolin is Dubya, from his Yale days as a heavy drinker and fraternity player, to his failure at holding numerous jobs that his father, the strict Bush Sr. (James Cromwell), helps him get including an oil rig, a baseball team owner, to his days as a Governor of Texas, and finally as the 43rd President of the United States. The movie adopts a non-linear narrative as we sense Bush can't seem to do anything right. That is until he quits drinking, helps his father win the Gulf War (with some added help from Karl Rove, a historical revision considering Rove was fired by George H.W. Bush's campaign for leaking a negative story about a fundraiser chief), and finally sees it as a message from God to be President. Dubya's mission is to go to Iraq after 9/11 because some connection is established between Saddam Hussein and the Al-Qaeda terrorist group. But is he merely exploiting his father's legacy with Iraq or trying to prove to his father that he can succeed as something, like being President of the U.S.! He can't hack it as Governor, an oil rig worker or anything else and he seems to ease into his presidency with lots of help. Oh, the irony, the nepotism, the Freudian irony.

Stone and his screenwriter Stanley Weiser ("Wall Street") have used several books on Bush to adapt the life of what some regard as the worst U.S. President in history (some historians point to Harry S. Truman or Herbert Hoover as infinitely worse). Stone doesn't seem to hold any one opinion on Dubya at all - he basically presents us with this Alfred E. Newman-type and consciously doesn't want us, the voters, to repeat the same mistake again. As expected from Stone, especially after "Nixon," the movie assumes empathy and a degree with sympathy for someone who has abused his power to perform historical actions, like a pre-emptive war strike, taking away liberties from its own citizens in the interests of a "Patriot Act," and so on. Clearly, if you have lived through the last eight Bush years, you know what to expect from Stone's film. Building on the humanity of the man, Josh Brolin is so brilliant as Bush Jr. (encompassing virtually every frame of the film) that it is hard to resist the film, despite a drawn-out narrative which includes AA meetings with an Evangelical Reverend (powerfully played by Stacy Keach) and one too many conversations with George Sr. The movie aims for a more Freudian subtext than needed, something that "Nixon" only flirted with. In "Nixon," we saw a more full-bodied portrait of the man behind the President, in addition to the media outcry, the war protests (Vietnam then) and a three- dimensional relationship between Nixon and his wife, Pat. "W." only seems fit to skirt the characters and the political turmoil rather than embody them. More of Laura Bush enabling Dubya would've been nice.

Speaking of, "W.'s" most involving scenes feature young Bush's romance with Laura Bush (a dynamic Elizabeth Banks) as they work together during his early campaigning for Governor of Texas (we see that Bush Jr. is more willing to punch below the belt than his father, particularly when attacking the late Ann Richards). And though many know what led to the Iraq War, Stone knows how to thrillingly stage scenes in the War Room as all the Bush administration figures gather to make this war possible, and to resist ending it. Interestingly, it shows Bush is not paid attention to and implicitly exists as some sort of patsy where all the blame can be laid on this dullard without question. Also worth noting is that the film sees Condoleezza Rice (Thandie Newton in a strangely mannered performance) as a stick figure with nothing to offer and Colin Powell (Jeffrey Wright) as a disgruntled general whose past experiences apparently mean very little (a heated exchanged between Powell and Scott Glenn's Donald Rumsfeld will make one chuckle). Added to that is a sneeringly evil and charismatic Dick Cheney (astoundingly played by Richard Dreyfuss, who deserved an Oscar nomination) and a subdued evil presence in subtle strokes by Toby Jones as Karl Rove, the Deputy Chief of Staff, the manipulator behind the scenes who teaches Bush how to address the press during Bush's first run for governor.

"W." is one of Ollie Stone's mellower films and gives Dubya the benefit of the doubt (Stone insists that he stopped hating Bush after 2004). The film does not give an endorsement of Bush's policies nor does it completely condemn them. It states that Bush became a man and showed his dad that he could rise as a leader, and not be seen as the black sheep of the family. Ironically, it also shows he failed despite succeeding. A fascinating and flawed portrait with Josh Brolin giving Bush a strong measure of humanity, but this W is still no Tricky Dick.

Spinning Top might make your eyes dizzy, kid

IT RUNS IN THE FAMILY (1994)

Reviewed by Jerry Saravia

I have a special memory in my heart for Bob Clark's "A Christmas Story." It is as memorable and nostalgic a piece of Americana as almost anything else related to Christmas, including Santa Claus. The trick to the success of "A Christmas Story" is that it had wicked humor and poked fun at itself. This rarely discussed sequel, "It Runs in the Family," is decent family fun but it loses a bit of the charm though, to be fair, it has a playful sense of wickedness.

Consider the setup. Kieran Culkin (replacing Peter Billingsley) plays Ralph Barker, the kid who once really wished for a Red Ryder BB Gun for Christmas. Now, he seems to wander around the summer time, wallowing in his pride to get the perfect spinning top, the kind that is not too colorful in design but just big enough to make other kids envious. Alas, this spinning top doesn't quite make it as inspired as the Red Ryder BB gun (and who can forget that the latter might shoot your eye out!) but it will do. It's basically a way of getting even with the local bully Lug Ditka (the eternally creepy and creepier eyes of Whit Hertford).

Meanwhile, Dad (Charles Grodin replacing Darren McGavin) bears some hostility to the noisy hillbilly neighbors next door known as the Bumpus clan. Dad fights back by staging an air siren and military instructions with the help of a turntable and some speakers in one of the funniest scenes in the entire movie. Mom (Mary Steenburgen replacing Melinda Dillon) has an affinity for gravy boats that are marked with reproductions of movie stars and gets one every Ladies' Night at the local movie theater, along with an animated short! The problem is she is sick of having so many gravy boats, and who wouldn't be.

Along with the return of director Bob Clark and narrator Jean Shepherd, "It Runs in the Family" (also known as "My Summer Story") replicates some of the same spirit and joy of "A Christmas Story" but little in the way of novelty or true inspiration. The problem may be the casting of key roles. Kieran Culkin is a cute kid but he is no Billingsley, and hardly gives the role the wide-eyed innocence Billingsley gave. Charles Grodin is a bit miscast but he gives it a good try - still, he seems harmful in his attempts to deal with the Bumpus clan (hence, a little more wickedness than expected). The beauty of Darren McGavin is that he only suggested giving anyone hell, not like he really had the intent. Mary Steenburgen, however, is beautifully cast and displays a little more sass than Melinda Dillon gave the original to warrant sufficient praise.

"It Runs in the Family" was shamefully dumped into limited release in September of 1994 without any real advertising by MGM. Again, I may be biased in my nostalgia for the original, but this sequel is nowhere near as memorable or as charming as "A Christmas Story." Still, reliable Jean Shepherd's narration and a few funny scenes (including references to jawbreakers will please the tots and the adults) and some decent acting overall, not to mention an affection for an era that no longer exists, merits a mild recommendation.

Silent Night, Deadly boring Brady Night

A VERY BRADY CHRISTMAS (1988)

Reviewed by Jerry Saravia

Now here is some priceless dialogue for you to savor: "I am feeling terribler." That's one. The next one is a doozy. Here we go: "Don't be sorry. Just be Wally." Both lines come from one of the worst TV movies ever made, and I mean worse than anything Lifetime has to offer. Any TV series or movie that crosses over into the Yuletide season is bound to be a disappointment. Don't forget "Star Wars Holiday Special" or the unwatchable "National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation." Then there is 1988's truly awful "A Very Brady Christmas." It is so wretched, so cheesy beyond cheeseteaks and cheesecakes, so syrupy beyond saccharine that I gag at the revolting thought of ever having to sit through again.

Now "The Brady Bunch" I did watch when I was younger and in small doses in the last few years. It was an unrealistic family comedy where every problem could be resolved within a half-hour. Most sitcoms from "I Love Lucy" to "Father Knows Best" resolved difficulties in a small amount of time as well, but this show stretched the boundaries of even TV reality. Remember Marcia's big nose? How the family had a second floor yet the outside house looked like a rancher? How overlit their backyard was? How we never saw a bathroom with a toilet? Mike's hair changing color at the most inappropriate moment?

Some shows were better than others. I did like the episode about Jesse James - it had a nice moral to it. The whole Vincent Price/Hawaii/ black magic two-parter I will choose to forget. But producer Sherwood Schwartz really turns reality on its head with this Christmas movie. Oh, where shall I begin? Let's see - the kids are all adults. Some are married, some aren't. Peter (Christopher Knight) is having an affair with his boss, and oddly likes to wear a nightgown! Bobby (Mike Lookinland) has turned to race-car driving and abandoned business school, unbeknownst to his parents. Marcia (Maureen McCormick) is having financial problems with her husband Wally (Jerry Houser) who has lost his job at a toy factory! Jan (Eve Plumb) is separated from her husband, a professor whose workload takes precedence. Greg Brady (Barry Williams) is a doctor now, married to his nurse assistant! Meanwhile, the parents, Mike (the late Robert Reed) and Carol (Florence Henderson), are planning surprise trips to different countries for each other! Then they decide to stay home and invite all the kids and their spouses for Christmas! Where on earth will they find the room?

The rancher still looks like a rancher from the outside, but not inside. Mike is still a stubborn architect and thinks Christmas solves every problem, which of course it does in the Brady world. I did forget to mention Cindy (Jennifer Runyon replacing Susan Olson) who is treated like a child. She is expected to go to her parents house for Christmas, instead of having a boinking time at a ski resort before graduating college! Oh, and I did forget the maid Alice (Ann B. Davis) who is treated as a member of the family when her dear Sam abandons her and is not expected to cook for anyone, yet she remains the faithful maid till the end, cooking Christmas dinner and somehow still wearing her old blue uniform! Another doozy is that she is expected to pick all the kids up at the airport and carry their luggage! Shouldn't Mike do that?

What we learn from "A Very Brady Christmas" is that a mother can help a daughter fix her marriage by suggesting sex; singing "O Come All Ye Faithful" helps Mike Brady lift concrete slabs off of his legs; and the youngest child of the family, no matter how old he or she is, should sit at a separate table with tots. Couldn't the writers think of a more creative story for the Bradys? No wonder they were spoofed a few years later in "The Brady Bunch Movie." If all this is to your liking, you'll love this Brady movie. I loathed it.