Spirited, joyous, vibrant soccer romance

BEND IT LIKE BECKHAM (2003)

Reviewed by Jerry Saravia

(Originally viewed in May, 2003)

I do not go to the movies to feel good or, likewise, feel bad. I go to the movies to simply watch, listen and, possibly, learn. Not all movies should have to teach since there is always the tendency of being didactic. Not all movies should sentimentalize to the point of manipulating the audience, especially when it comes to clouds of darkness that aim to present the vilest of inhuman actions without an ounce of humanity. Oh, but I digress. "Bend it Like Beckham" is not educational or intellectual, but it is one of the most rousing entertainments of the year, as spirited and joyous as "Monsoon Wedding" was a year earlier.

The comparison to "Monsoon Wedding" is noteworthy in that it deals with the sanctity of rituals and values in a family surrounded by modernist ideals. In this case, we have the teenage "Jess" (Parminder Nagra) who lives in London with her Sikh family. She loves to play soccer with her male pals and keeps a poster of her favorite British soccer player, David Beckham, in her room. One day, she is seen vigorously playing soccer by Juliette (Keira Knightley), who offers her a chance to play in a semi-pro, all-girls team. The strict Irish coach (Jonatha Rhys Meyers) agrees seeing that Jess is quite a natural on the field - they may have a chance to play in Germany. The only problem is that Jess's parents are not fond of her athletic abilities - they forbid her from playing and insist she get married and go to college (though the mother is not crazy about her travelling abroad). Juliette and the coach insist that Jess keep playing in the team, which means Jess has to keep all this a secret.

Nothing that transpires in "Bend it Like Beckham" is particularly original - this is formula filmmaking without much room for compromise. The difference is that the movie is infectious with pure joy from one frame to the next. All the actors, including the refreshingly appealing Parminder Nagra, are as vibrant and alive as one can hope. Though I am no fan of uplifting sports movies, the final soccer climax is truly uplifting. All this is due to the humanity displayed by the entire cast - never have I seen such exuberance or flair by characters who remain true to their actions. Jess will play soccer regardless of what anyone else thinks. Jess's parents will go out of their way to convince her not to play. Jess's sister persists in marrying the man she wants, despite that her in-laws-to-be think they have witnessed Jess kissing a girl. As co-written and directed by Gurinder Chadha, "Bend it Like Beckham" respects the attitudes and values of its characters without trying to sitcomify (if such a word could exist) or reduce their behaviors to one-dimensional status. Even Juliette's mother (played with delicious wit by Juliet Stevenson) could be a cartoonish rendition but her tears and surprise at the possibility that Juliette could be a lesbian feels truthful and comical - what a nice combination.

"Bend it Like Beckham" rocks with excitement and pure laughs. The final scene at an airport is handled with refreshing restraint without succumbing to sentiment. Yes, it is like a high-octane, predictable teenage comedy but its cross-cultural references and change in values and ideals raise it a notch above the "American Pie" school. A comical pleasurable delight, a lollapalooza, a real blast of cool air, "Bend it Like Beckham" is pure entertainment.

White Man's Laundry?

FALLING DOWN (1993)

Reviewed by Jerry Saravia

(Originally written in 1993)

Rush Limbaugh said back in 1993 that "Falling Down" was a falsity; an unrealistic depiction of the deterioration of the American Dream. I normally would not agree with Limbaugh (who was funnier and sharper in those days) but he did nail this overwrought movie down to its paranoid essence.

Michael Douglas plays a four-eyed unemployed worker for a defense contractor named William "D-FENS" Foster, who has a short haircut that seems to have stepped out of a 1950's classroom. He loses his temper in traffic, abandons his car, is armed with a shotgun and a bazooka, and walks all over the city of L.A. He is desperate to confront the very issues that bother him such as Korean convenience store owners, gays in army surplus stores, homeless people, construction crews working on repairing streets that need no repairing, trespassing on Latino gang turf, and insisting on getting breakfast at a fast-food joint. "He has a propensity for violence," says William's ex-wife (played by Barbara Hershey). William also has a propensity for walking literally hundreds of miles around L.A. without breaking a sweat - he is the Terminator who needs an attitude adjustment.

"Falling Down" is a satirical attempt to deconstruct a society that has changed from the "good old days" - a white man's paranoia tale of the withering American Dream with more right-winged fervor than even Limbaugh himself has (it is odd how this blowhard himself is no fan of this movie). The problem is that Michael Douglas gives a cartoonish performance of a wacko with no real ideology - he is simply mad as hell and is armed to the teeth. The fast-food joint sequence goes on too long (William decides he will have lunch after all after being told that breakfast hours are over), as well as the army surplus store sequence with the Nazified owner (Frederic Forrest). I never understood the point of this odyssey where the exasperated William creates more havoc than what already exists in La-La Land. The movie is so unrealistic and unintentionally funny that its rather disturbing subliminal messages about society don't register ("White Man's Laundry" signs flash on screen occasionally so that we can empathize with this crude antihero?) This movie is about an angry loon with no dimension or cunning insight into his neurosis. "Falling Down" falls before it really even starts.

I know tired black-comedy slapstick when I see it

MIXED NUTS (1994)

Reviewed by Jerry Saravia

Christmas movies can often be pleasing to the eyes and the ears, witness exhibit A, "It's a Wonderful Life." Sometimes, we can get serial-killer Christmas movies, witness exhibit B, "Silent Night, Deadly Night" and the underrated "Black Christmas." And other times, we can get whimsical, comical Yuletide examples like "National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation," "A Christmas Story" or "The Santa Clause." "Mixed Nuts" would fall in the latter category and it almost works, until it starts straining for laughs.

The setting is Venice Beach, California, which means no snowy landscapes. Just along the boardwalk is the office location of "Lifesavers," a volunteer hotline that helps suicidal, depressed or lonely callers. Steve Martin plays Philip, the manager who runs the non-profit hotline and his staff includes Mrs. Munchik (Madeleine Kahn), who deplores Philip's fruitcake gifts, and the overly sympathetic Miss Lonelyhearts character, Catherine (Rita Wilson). Unfortunately, Philip's organization will go down under unless he pays his overdue rent, thanks to an eviction notice from his landlord (Garry Shandling). Meanwhile, we have Mrs. Munchik stuck in an elevator, Catherine vying for Philip's love, an overbearing loser in a Santa suit (Anthony LaPaglia), bicyclists carrying Christmas trees, a lonely transvestite (Liev Schreiber), a pregnant, used-clothes owner (Juliette Lewis), and last, but not least, Adam Sandler as a ukelele-playing simpleton who writes for a living, that is, he writes on T-shirts. Oh, and dare I forget a walk-on performance by the very young Haley Joel Osment.

"Mixed Nuts" begins promisingly as an expose of the pros and cons of running a volunteer hotline, especially receiving calls from potential suicides (my favorite is Steven Wright, pointing a gun to his head while he stands in a phone booth). Writer-director Nora Ephron eschews the idea rather quickly by introducing too many characters, none half as interesting as Martin's Philip. The movie gets mired in unpleasantly oddball characters who may give you a migraine. One can marvel the days of Ernst Lubitsch and Billy Wilder when subtlety and nuance dictated laughs more than anything. Here, Ephron chooses a slapstick approach but it is too high-pitched to score any laughs. The whole cast, except for Rita Wilson and Adam Sandler, overact and bicker and scream endlessly. After a while, it becomes monotonous. A good example is the last twenty minutes of the film, which depend on thickly syrupy music, a corpse, and loud renditions of "Deck the Halls" - so loud in fact that you'll wish Christmas never existed. I would have preferred "Hark, the Herald Angels Sing," and at a slower, quieter pitch.

"Mixed Nuts" is just the latest example of a comedy with surefire trimmings that are severely squandered by too many bells and whistles. I am not a fan of slapstick, but I know tired black-comedy slapstick when I see it.

Most unusual hit man ever

PANIC (2000)

Reviewed by Jerry Saravia

William H. Macy is one of the few actors alive that can adapt himself to any role and succeed. But there is more to this master thespian - he makes us care about him. Playing a hit man is a big stretch for Macy, but he accomplishes the role with style, panache and pathos. Frankly, this is the most unusual hit man I have ever seen on screen.

Macy is Alex, a hit man who works exclusively for his father, Michael (Donald Sutherland). His father has a family business to run, mainly to kill certain clients. Alex is his dutiful son and number one killer, and has served him ever since he was a teenager. Alex is married to Martha (Tracy Ullman), has an inquisitive young son (David Dorfman), and a nice big house. His wife and his son have no clue what daddy does for a living (he runs a home mailing service as a cover). The main problem that sets the story in motion is that Alex's new assignment involves someone he knows. But Alex is getting tired of his job and is not happy - he has either lost the enthusiasm or does not want to work for his father anymore. He loves his family but he needs something more, some sort of escape. Alex sees a psychiatrist (John Ritter) and confesses to his real profession (a big mistake). Then there is the young, depressed bisexual Sarah (Neve Campbell), who is also seeing a psychiatrist. Alex wants to have an affair with Sarah but she is reluctant to being treated as some sex toy.

"Panic" unfolds as a drama with some black humor, but nothing that happens come as much of a surprise. The psychiatrist angle has been done already in "Analyze This" and in the HBO series "The Sopranos," and the last climactic act is lazily written off as a simple shootout. The biggest surprise in the film is Macy, who makes this hit man as normal as he can, without the shady glasses or any shady features for that matter. He is not remorselessly evil, just someone who has been used and abused by his father for so long that he no longer sees the purpose in his job. A professional killer may not be a credible character for Macy to play - he can pass for someone who hires a hit man to off his wife (as he did in "Fargo") than the genuine article - but he makes it work so well that I couldn't think of any other actor that could do it as convincingly.

Macy does have a nice rapport with Neve Campbell's sad Sarah, though it is resolved a little too abruptly. I also like the scenes with Donald Sutherland as the aging, aloof head of the family business who laughs at his own human depravity, and counts on his son to prolong the business (including a nifty subplot that did come as a surprise to me). Also worth noting is Barbara Bain as the hateful mother of Alex, who has been through the ups and downs of the business. John Ritter is effective if underused as the righteous psychiatrist, who is ready to call the police if he knows of any future hits (naturally, all his ethics are getting screwed up).

"Panic" is often more blackly funny than dramatic but its tragic overtones do not mix well with its comedic tones. The resolutions seem rushed, and the characters are left with situations that seem manufactured out of hasty, last-minute rewriting. But what holds it together is William H. Macy, playing Alex like a torn man who no longer knows how to keep his emotions in check. He brings a level of humanity and purpose (not to mention credibility) to a largely unbelievable character.

God told me to have sex with you

OUTLAW PROPHET: WARREN JEFFS (2014)

Reviewed by Jerry Saravia

For a Lifetime movie of the week, "Outlaw Prophet: Warren Jeffs" is a highly disturbing freak show of a movie - an examination of a fundamentalist wacko Mormon Leader (former president of the Fundamentalist Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints to the rest of you) who married and slept with several underage girls. Based on a chillingly true story, the movie never veers from how he exploited and fooled so many people into believing he had a clear communication signal with God.

Tony Goldwyn is Warren Jeffs who, at the start of the film, has a major crying fit when he realizes he will not succeed his father as the prophet. Warren's father has passed on (played by Martin Landau, always a pro in any role) and Warren decides to go against his father's wishes and proclaims himself the leader, much to the shock of everyone! Warren excommunicates people left and right, starts marrying a bunch of his dad's widows (most of them underage), kills all the neighborhood dogs whom he considers emissaries of the Devil, does away with TV's and anything that could challenge the people of this isolated existence, and insists that God speaks to him everyday. The truth is that Warren merely wants to have lots of sex with all his wives, usually thrusting himself in one wife while the others look on, and he knows he is not doing God's will - he just wants everyone to believe he is. After awhile, Warren starts to believe his own lies.

Most of "Outlaw Prophet" is episodic featuring a tightly controlled narrative that, occasionally, features a few cliches that tinker with the bleakness of its setting and the nastiness of its protagonist. David Keith (from "An Officer and a Gentleman" and "Lords of Discipline") is the obsessed cop who wants to bust Warren despite not being welcomed in town and having his motel room ransacked. I admire David Keith but he barely gets to do much here except look concerned. Same with the wonderful Molly Parker as Warren's No.1 wife whose part is far too undernourished.

Still, as a behind-the-scenes look at how a man corrupted his own religion to fulfill his own vices, "Outlaw Prophet" is profoundly tough to watch. Goldwyn shows how far a man can go to use God as justification for everything.  

Simpleton's life is a box of chocolates

FORREST GUMP (1994)

Reviewed by Jerry Saravia
(Originally viewed in 1994)

"Forrest Gump" was the most celebrated movie of 1994. Not only was it the biggest box-office hit of that year, it also won Oscars for Best Picture, Best Actor, Best Adapted Screenplay, Best Film Editing and many other awards. The movie and the character of Forrest Gump have both become cultural icons, already on the pop culture radar with the famous line, "Life is like a box of chocolates." All this attention and awards can make people forget why the heck it became so popular in the first place. I like the film, but I am still trying to figure out the secret of its success.

Forrest Gump is played by Tom Hanks, who underplays the character beautifully. He is a Southern boy who is slower than the average kid. Nevertheless, his caring mother (Sally Field) manages to get him in school thanks to some persuasion with the principal. The problem is Forrest has problems walking (he gets leg braces) and can't seem to get along with kids. Well, there is one that likes him named Jenny (played by Robin Wright) and they become the best of friends. Forrest also discovers one day he is a fast runner. He gets a college scholarship playing football, goes to fight in the Vietnam War, becomes a ping-pong ball champion, starts a business with a shrimp boat appropriately named "Jenny," and becomes friends with Lieutenant Dan (Gary Sinise), an amputee who was saved in the war by Forrest. Forrest is only missing one thing: Jenny whom he wants to marry. But Jenny has another life as a hippie, drug addict and anti-war protester.

"Forrest Gump" has all the hallmarks of a Hollywood production. It has the big emotions and entertainment value of a sprawling tale of one man's life and his spiritual need for love. But the basic problem I have is that Gump is presented as the village idiot where events happen to him yet he is never affected by them. Having seen the film more than once, I still do not get why writer Eric Roth features all those presidential assassination attempts and actual deaths, from George Wallace to Ronald Reagan, and have Forrest in the background aloof with no emotional connection. You could say that the character is like a feather whose childlike innocence and naivete makes him less susceptible to being harmed or affected by world events - what we don't know, or don't care to know, can't hurt us which is what the film seems to be saying. Yet Forrest goes on with his life, telling of his adventures to pedestrians while he sits on a park bench waiting for a bus. If life were only this simple.

Director Robert Zemeckis doesn't falter with actors, as he's proven with "Back to the Future." Tom Hanks is the star of the show, never aiming to make the character cartoonish or vapid. Hanks brings soul and strength to the character, though it is a two-dimensional role at best. The underrated Robin Wright seems to be playing a more realistic character, teetering on the edge between life and death. A tremendously scary scene shows Jenny in a drug-induced state, walking on the edge of a balcony of a high-rise building while the wind literally wakes her up from her stupor. I also like the moment she revisits her home where she was abused by her father. Also noteworthy is Gary Sinise, in the best performance in the film, as the amputated Lieutenant Dan who wanted to die in the war like his ancestors did in past battles. He eventually finds peace with himself.

"Forrest Gump" was justly celebrated for combining live action elements with actual historic events flawlessly through the magic of digital imagery. It is still a hoot seeing Forrest talking to John F. Kennedy, Lyndon B. Johnson, John Lennon and others. Of course, the CGI technology, as it came to be known, has become the standard for all special-effects. Only the Lennon sequence in the Dick Cavett show is a bit off the mark - Lennon's lips, which I sense were digitally manipulated, don't match the words he speaks.

As pure entertainment, "Forrest Gump" certainly delivers. The ending, which compresses and rushes a series of events regarding Jenny in less than twenty minutes, lacks any real emotional weight since it is given short-shrift (comparatively speaking, Sinise's Dan plight and sense of renewal is far more touching). Jenny's plight has intrigued and bothered me for many years, mainly because her character, a crusader and a rebel, is made to suffer. Forrest plays by the rules and gets by. He just simply knows a lot about love. Sounds vaguely conservative, if you ask me.

Sinking history down the drain

PEARL HARBOR (2001)

Reviewed by Jerry Saravia

(Originally viewed in May, 2001)

I recall a short 1995 film by director Hugh Hudson made in conjunction with the one-hundred-year anniversary of the Lumiere films. The film focused on a group of Japanese children running through a playground as the camera tracks them and we hear explosions in the soundtrack. The area they played in was a Hiroshima bombing site. The film was a meaningful, poetic way of conveying the message that war can destroy dreams, especially those of innocent Japanese children. Not that I expected Michael Bay's souped-up, more-bang-for-your-buck extravaganza to capture such poetry but it could have at least tried. "Pearl Harbor" is "Armageddon" for people who love revisionist, dumbed-down history for the sake of some special-effects. Considering that "Harbor" and "Armageddon" come from Bay, I should have known better than to expect a serious treatise on one of the more tragic events in American history.

The bulk of "Pearl Harbor" is a tired, cliche-ridden - not let's rethink that. The bulk of the film is a bland, superfluous romance suffused with enough syrupy music and dull melodrama to make women swoon for all the wrong reasons. Ben Affleck is Rafe McCawley, the flyboy pilot whose aspirations outweigh his romantic charisma. He falls for a nurse (Kate Beckinsale) after being injected with hypodermic needles in his arse. They fall in love too quickly even for standard screen time, and it is no wonder since neither has much inner life or interest beyond blind love. Rafe's childhood buddy, Danny Walker (Josh Hartnett), is also an ambitious pilot. He falls for the nurse exactly three months after Rafe has been presumed dead from being shot in the skies by enemy fire. I am sure you'll know what to expect next. I would have thought that a soap-opera plot like this would have died eons ago. Honestly, why would such a simplistic love story interest anyone now in this millennium?

About one hour and a half later, the film gets to the Pearl Harbor tragedy where over 2,500 people died after being bombed by Japanese fighter planes. The whole frenetic sequence lasts forty minutes. Then we segue back to the love story itself before we get a climax where the U.S. bombs Tokyo in retaliation (the inspiration for the novel and film of the same name, "Thirty Seconds Over Tokyo"). In the meantime, the Japanese commandants are briefly shown to be dubious of their attack strategy, only to be shown as inhuman villains for the sake of some forced heroic chutzpah from the Americans in Tokyo.

The two attack scenes are full of razzle-dazzle effects and plenty of explosions but something feels off in the execution. The attitude is all wrong and that should come as no surprise for those who enjoyed the popcorn mentality of "Armageddon" (I was among the minority). Director Bay enjoys visual overkill and he loves Dolby-ized explosions but all at the expense of human involvement and human tragedy. He does not present it as a post-"Saving Private Ryan" reality where we feel the loss of innocent lives by unforeseeable forces. Instead, it is an exciting sequence but almost too exciting - the thrill is sickening knowing how many people actually suffered and died (especially those trapped inside the "Arizona" ship). We may as well be watching "Rambo" rather than a serious World War II film.

If the attack scenes were omitted, we would be left with two hours of an interminable, sappy romance that lacks passion and chemistry. Ben Affleck can't cut it as a romantic leading man. Josh Hartnett is simply fodder for Affleck so he can have at least one bar fight and a final reconciliation that smacks of pure sentimental hogwash. Kate Beckinsale comes off unscathed but compare her thankless role to her work in "Last Days of Disco," and you may be left wondering what a potentially exciting actress is doing in a movie like this.

With Affleck as a witless flyboy, Jon Voight as former president F.D.R. who seems ready to have a stroke, Alec Baldwin as the pontificating Col. Dolittle and Beckinsale as the love object of the two pilots, not to mention a characterless tragedy portrayed as the latest in flag-waving American propaganda, "Pearl Harbor" manages to sink history down the drain and everyone involved with it.

Note: I have the feeling that nowadays, people can't handle or admit to certain truths. They rather have their history toned from an R rating so it is more acceptable to the masses, thus causing the least amount of controversy possible. It is disheartening to know that people will see this movie to see the Pearl Harbor fireworks sequence, forgetting that it should be upsetting to watch, not exhilarating.