First Great Good/Bad Movies Ever Made

GLEN OR GLENDA (1953) and PLAN NINE FROM OUTER SPACE (1956) 

Reviewed by Jerry Saravia

"Glen or Glenda" and "Plan Nine from Outer Space" are the quintessential Ed Wood movies - seemingly empty, stupid and, above all, hilariously bad. Ed Wood, the director, made the films on excessively low-budgets and it shows. For example, with "Plan Nine," the lighting is poor and inconsistent (as it was in most of his flicks), there are continuity problems throughout (night and day settings mix interchangably), the acting is nonexistent, and the sets and dialogue are probably as threadbare and absurd as you might expect from a grade-Z flick (check out those paper plates masquerading as flying saucers). And the movie is so bad (and proud of it, too) that it works and is worth seeing because it is never boring. The humor though unintentional brings it a certain charm that makes most of the tepid monster/sci-fi flicks of the time unwatchable.


This was Bela Lugosi's last role yet what we see are remnants of a performance - he cries at a funeral for Vampira (!) and is seen traipsing through a forest area with a black cape in what looks like a remake of Dracula. These are outtakes hilariously repeated throughout the film, and to bridge the gap for the missing scenes, Ed hired a chiropractor to play Bela's role wearing a cape which he covers his mouth with! These feeble attempts at fashioning a film around a film star's death is not unlike the similarly assembled footage of Bruce Lee in "Game of Death."


Whether or not Ed intended this film to be as bad as it is, or to be recognized as it is now (the worst film ever made) is besides the point, it has gained cult status and has even been made into a Broadway musical and inspired a sequel! The movie is famous enough to have driven director Tim Burton to make a fabulous film about the man himself. "Plan Nine" is the kind of movie where listening to the dialogue makes it a sheerly pleasurable experience (though the finale where an alien makes a speech about how we, the puny humans "are stupid, stupid, stupid" actually is actually smartly written). 


And how can one forget the idiocy and sheerly hysterical innuendoes of "Glen or Glenda" (1953), a truly bad film but far funnier than "Plan Nine." The film purports to be an essay on the issues and myths of transvestism of the 1950's (originally the film was to be based on the headlined Christine Jorgensen story of that time). Ed Wood plays a man who harbors a fetish for angora and for women's clothing. His girlfriend (Dolores Fuller) is unaware of his behavior but grows suspicious. And to top it all off, we have buffalo roaming the countryside in some shots, inexplicable scenes of steel factories with voice-over narration, discussions on sexual orientation, endless dream sequences, Ed dressed in various styles of women's clothes, Bela Lugosi as a demon or devil (or as himself possibly) watching over all the denizens of the city of L.A. making remarks such as "Watch out for the little dragon that sits at your doorstep. He eats little boys. Puppy dog tails, and big fat snails! Bevare! Take care!"


None of it makes a lick of sense, but it is a hoot and a half to watch it and you'll admire Ed for making a very personal film in a time when such topics were considered taboo. A classic, in every sense of the word. Watch it with the lights out! 


I have not seen all of Ed Wood's flicks but I do admire the man's passion (and penchant for single takes, something even John Huston was known for). Ed Wood's movies will last whereas purely bad cinematic turds like "Robot Monster" won't. 

SAG's McCarthyism on a Stuntwoman

Screen Actor's Guild's McCarthyism on a Stuntwoman

By Jerry Saravia

Leslie Hoffman and Ricardo Montalban in The Naked Gun

http://stuntrek43.wordpress.com/

Women never get treated fairly in the workforce, a Federal Government known fact. Stuntwomen get treated even worse while the Federal Government, the Producers and the Screen Actors Guild turn a blind eye towards this situation. Still, nobody has been treated with as much malignance as stuntwoman Leslie Hoffman, who has been blacklisted by SAG through its past Members of the Board of Directors, including certain stuntmen who, as stunt coordinators, hire the stuntpeople and the Producers. 

I've known Hoffman on the silver screen, as I am sure many Horror Fans do, from her brief cameo in "A Nightmare on Elm Street," the 1984 horror classic by director Wes Craven. She played a High School Guard, who is actually Freddy Krueger as she taunts Nancy (Heather Langenkamp) in a dream sequence with the words, "Hey Nancy, No running in the hallway." Actually, Leslie Hoffman has also had a long run in the movie business as a stuntwoman and stunt coordinator; performing stunts on T.V. series such as "Star Trek: Deep Space Nine" & "Voyager," "M*A*S*H," "Emergency," "The Love Boat," "Remington Steele," and many others. Film credits include everything from 1976's "Two-Minute Warning" (her first union job that allowed her to join SAG) to "The Naked Gun" where she did a stunt doubling for Queen Elizabeth. 

All these early credits enabled Leslie to become the first Stuntwoman to be elected to the Hollywood Board of Directors of SAG (1981-1985), as well as the first Stuntwoman elected to the AFTRA Local Board and AFTRA National Board. It was with the AFTRA National Board where she and Board Member Howard Caine convinced them to create the category of Stuntperson. These titles, unfortunately, came with more handicaps than perks. From the first day that Leslie was elected to the SAG Board of Directors position, she was vilified, lied to and made to seem as if she couldn't handle the job single-handedly. This was mainly due to her gender, thus she became BLACKLISTED. "Due to the stuntman who was finishing out his term, spreading vicious rumors about me, it seriously compromised my ability to work with the Board of Directors because many of them tainted me. A stuntman was brought in to 'complement me and to help me do my job', which is normally handled by one person," said Leslie during our phone interview. Edward Asner, an actor and liberal activist (best known for playing Lou Grant), was President of SAG from 1981-1985 and did little to help Leslie at all. In fact, "He sided with the stuntmen, conveniently stopping me from helping Stuntwomen and Stuntpeople of Color," said Leslie. "As well as making sure actors were kept safe.“

Leslie Hoffman did her job too well, or maybe a woman doing this job is not what SAG had in mind. What is troubling is that she was elected by the SAG Membership and the Nominating Committee had chosen her as well. What did the Nominating Committee have in mind when they nominated her? Perhaps, the fact that Leslie looked after and spoke out on stunts performed by everyone, not just stunt groups but also People of Color, children and independent stuntpeople, as well as actors. For example, shortly after the "Twilight Zone: The Movie" tragedy that resulted in the deaths of two Non-Union children working past certain designated hours and actor Vic Morrow, Leslie was sent to Sacramento to testify in changing the Child Labor Laws. The California State Attorney wanted a new "Twilight Zone" Law passed that would say “children cannot be near any rotors." Leslie pointed out that it should be specific to helicopters since rotors exist in cars, hair dryers, etc. Considering Leslie was the Chairwoman of the National Stunt and Safety Committee and the Co-Chair of the Young Performers Committee, her expertise in this area of stunts should not have come as a surprise. Yet when it came to Contract Negotiations, the Executive Board went outside the norm by not sending the SAG Director to New York - instead they sent a Caucasian Stuntman.

The truth is that a certain stunt group promoted by SAG did not want Leslie to speak out on anything but stunts. Since Leslie could not be a member of the male-only group, it was an easier to remove her. Rumors were spread among this group and other parts of the stunt community that Leslie had voted against everything this certain stunt group wanted. "If Leslie likes the things that have been going for her with work, she should keep on being Asner’s little girl. Maybe she’s not planning on being a stuntwoman anymore, maybe she’s going to be an actress and then Ed can get her jobs,” explains Leslie. A stuntman dictated these words to the SAG Board Member, who was standing next to Leslie from this stunt group. Asner was made aware of this assault towards Leslie in a letter written by this Board Member, and Asner sided with the stuntmen. This discrimination continued on to the end of Leslie Hoffman's career by certain Stunt Coordinators who never hired her again. This was not due to her lack of professionalism or knowledge in the area of stunts. Her crime was that she was a woman in a male-dominated field.

Such discrimination does not come as a shock to some (though it may to some readers), especially in Hollywood and in an organization like SAG. Consider these facts - SAG contracts for actors often eclipse actresses by more than half. For example, in 1997, SAG contracts for actresses exceeded by 472 million whereas for actors, it exceeded 928 million. This would mean discrimination is alive and well and the Producers and the SAG headquarters do little to stop it. An interesting fact is that since the EEOC (Equal Employment Opportunity Commission) of 1964 stipulated that any Company that received funds from the Federal Government is supposed to investigate any discriminatory acts and correct them. Therefore, the Producers are violating Federal Government rules. Also the Producers and SAG since (at least) 1977 have the following “so-called" affirmative action clause in their contract that stipulates, “When applicable and with due regards to safety, women can double for women and minorities can double for minorities.”  This is clearly a statement that a Caucasian Stunt Coordinator must qualify Women and People of Color, but nowhere will one find, in the Codified Contract, that a Caucasian Stuntman must be qualified!  This also makes it harder for a Stuntwomen or Stuntperson of Color to advance to the position of Stunt Coordinator.

  

After 35 years of performing stunts on Big Screen and on Television, Leslie Hoffman started to suffer aches in her neck and her back and some possible mild brain injuries or concussions, primarily from all the falls and fights she performed. First, she filed a Workman’s Comp claim based on Continuous Trauma, and then for Social Security. However, the straw that broke the camel's back came when in 2003, Leslie had the symptoms of post-concussion syndrome, which include lack of sleep, aches, depression and a finally a nervous breakdown.

Leslie Hoffman was awarded a settlement in the Workman’s Comp and was considered permanently disabled by the Federal Government so she received SSI, which in turn led to SAG giving Leslie her SAG Pension that she was entitled to for her various years as a stuntwoman. Yet SAG denied her the Disability Health Plan, a well-hidden clause in the Producer-SAG Health Pamphlet that stipulates that SAG members who suffer a career-ending injury while working on the set are entitled to health benefits. SAG denied her health benefits and she has been forced to file a lawsuit against the Plan under the ERISA Act (Employee Retirement Security Act). She has been grossly overpaying on a Health Plan, RX Plan and Dental insurance from different Companies while waiting for the result of the ERISA Lawsuit.

According to Leslie, in July of 2010, an appeal board of no less than 75 people (some were in attendance via satellite uplink) were present to discuss Leslie's Health Plan and if she should receive it. "It was more like an Inquisition," said Leslie. Three of the SAG Trustees shared a past with Leslie. Six were ex-SAG Board Members, one being the Vice President for two of the four years that Leslie served and the other member was an Alternate to the Executive Board. Finally the third member was the stuntman from the 1980's whom the Executive Board sent instead of the Stunt Board Member, and there was a medical expert hired by the Producer-SAG Health Plan. When asked by the medical expert about the paper she had brought in, Leslie had stated that she had certain symptoms from Post-Concussion-Syndrome but that she was not a qualified doctor. This doctor's response to her and the room about Post Concussion Syndrome was a declarative "NO!" followed by a vile laugh (keep in mind, this doctor never examined Leslie). The stuntman, who is clearly not a practitioner of medicine, let out this doozy – “Knowing that you have Congenital Scoliosis, maybe you should have never been a Stunt Woman." Leslie did not have Congenital Scoliosis and had recent MRIs and a Bone Scan to prove it.

Suffice to say, Leslie Hoffman is clearly the victim of a Hate Crime and has been blacklisted by SAG (her last job was as stunt coordinator for a "Star Trek" fan film entitled "Starship Farragut"). Though she is a veteran stuntwoman and an Advocate for all, her own price to pay for her art is being female in an actively though not exclusively male profession, populated by several stuntwomen who never get enough of the credit they deserve. Leslie has tried to tell her story to the NAACP, NOW and ACLU, not to mention various magazines, radio shows and newspapers, and all of them showed no interest whatsoever. Leslie has recently fought for other stuntmen and a woman who were entitled to the SAG Disability Health Plan - she was able to obtain for them reimbursement and disability health plans they might otherwise have not received. Leslie was also featured in an article on another issue that SAG, the Producers and the Health Plan will not address, which is that FICA (Social Security and Medicare) should not be taken out of residuals (“Disabled Workers of the World Unite!” is the article that explains in detail about residuals at http://www.hollywoodtoday.net/2010/11/03/disabled-workers-of-the-world-unite/ ) The irony is that the stuntpeople whom she has helped received their Health plan or reimbursement without having to go through the Appeal Board, whereas Leslie had to. This is clearly retaliation for her Advocacy of more than 30 years. Ever the resilient fighter for justice, Leslie Hoffman is a voice that needs to be heard and reckoned with, for the good of all Members of the Screen Actors Guild. No deaf ears in her hallway, please.  

The Sharon Tate Murder: Waters-style

MULTIPLE MANIACS (1970)

Reviewed by Jerry Saravia (Originally written in 2003)

I recently watched one of John Waters's first films, "Multiple Maniacs," and all I can say is: he may have bad taste but he sure is funny. "Multiple Maniacs" may be well my favorite John Waters film by far, a film that aims low and delivers high notes. It is a gross-out comedy but not in the same vein as today's equivalents, and it is certainly not as putrid as "Pink Flamingos." I sense Waters is having fun here without getting mired in tastelessness or mean-spiritedness.

The film stars Divine as herself, as she is the queen attraction of something called "The Calvacade of Perversions." These so-called perversions, which include two gay men kissing, a man known as the "puke eater" and other indecent acts, are introduced by Divine's boyfriend, the late David Lochary. He stands outside a tent overlooking suburbia with a microphone and invites people in these tents to see the perversions for free. All the people are shocked by what they see yet they can't stop looking (one even comments about a fat woman's hairy body). Divine is quite an attraction already, but she wants nothing more than to rob and kill people! She claims responsibility for Sharon Tate's death and for having scribbled the word "PIG" with her bloody fingers. David is understandably shocked since he has no memory of ever killing Sharon Tate.

The paper-thin plot has David having an affair with a wannabe blonde perversion named Bonnie (Mary Vivian Pearce). Meanwhile, Divine has a fling with a lesbian (Mink Stole) inside a church! Here is where we are privy to the "Rosary" sequence that is as revolting and sacrilegious as you can imagine. I do not have go into details but this is a scene that must be seen to be believed. When Divine catches wind of David's affair, she prepares to kill with utmost relish. And before the end of the film, we are treated for yet another infamous sequence involving Divine getting raped by a lobster!

Now then, how the heck can I recommend such garbage? Well, quite simple really. "Multiple Maniacs" is crude and irreverent and it knows it, and makes no apologies for it. I found this film funnier and more personal than "Pink Flamingos," and I think Waters lost his edge ever since this cult classic and "Flamingos." Today, Waters could scarcely do anything to offend or shock people unless he found something personal to say, albeit with the religious iconography of his upbringing and the late, great Divine. Other merits are the choice of rock and roll music on the soundtrack (including Elvis's "Jailhouse Rock"), and choice excerpts from Gustav Holst's "The Planets." Any film that ends with "God Bless America" while Divine preens and struts her stuff is worthwhile in my book. Divine is simply charming and suitably creepy at the same time. Kudos also go to Cookie, Divine's daughter (played by the late Cookie Mueller who walks around naked in her apartment) and her boyfriend who despises David (their conversations are hysterical).

What separates this mondo trash from other trash films of the period is its compassion. Waters is willing to listen to these perverts and see them as people, not as caricatures. Consider the scene where David is making love to Bonnie and discusses getting away from Divine. There is a touch of humanity here that makes it all worthwhile, and you actually feel sorry for David.

Yes, "Multiple Maniacs" is badly shot and composed with a horrendous number of overexposed shots. There are also numerous jump cuts and largely asynchronous sound (I think Waters was still learning how to edit). The film was shot for $5,000 in grainy stock black-and-white film, and it shows but so what. Jump cuts do not bother me, nor does asynchronous sound (both have become part of film grammar). What is most hilarious is seeing Divine parading around the town of Baltimore, carrying all her weight around and stepping into trouble every step of the way. Disgusting? Perverted? Yes, it is all those things. And damn funny too.

The Greatest Music Video Ever Made

SCORPIO RISING (1964)

Reviewed by Jerry Saravia

(On my top ten list of greatest films ever made)

Kenneth Anger's "Scorpio Rising" is one of the most revolutionary films of the past fifty years. It set a whole new precedent for filmmaking in general, in terms of its fast-cutting style, rock n' roll music montages, rebellious allure of motorcyclists, sex, death, and so on. In fact, I may be so bold as to say that this is the first sex, drugs and rock n' roll movie ever made. And Anger did it all in less than half-an-hour of film time.

As director Anger recently explained (in an interview with Professor Kinema on his cable access show) about his most famous (or infamous) short film, "Scorpio Rising" is an ironic take on "The Wild One," the latter being a fairly tame motorcycle movie next to this one. In fact, "Scorpio Rising" is all about irony, and yet it says something rather disconcerting about the world in America before the love generation and the decadence of the 1970's set in. At times, "Scorpio Rising" seems to be an ironic take on the 1950's yet commenting on the growing motorcycle cult of the late 1960's. Anger even dedicated the film to the Hell's Angels.

"Scorpio Rising" begins with average men in their late teens or early twenties polishing and fixing their precious bikes (or as Anger referred to them as "Christmas tree versions of motorcycles".) The men are inside their garages, and we hear lovely pop songs in the background as the camera tracks back and forth between the bikers and their bikes, wind-up toys of motorbikes, and a prominent visage of a skull in the background. Later, we see the bikers dressing up in their uniforms, a combination of leather jackets and straps to the tune of Bobby Vinton's "Blue Velvet" (long before this version become iconized with David Lynch's film). The irony begins again, as the song has the lyric, "She wore blue velvet," yet we see a blonde biker dressing up in a blue shirt and a black leather jacket. As photographed in close-up, along with subliminal shots of a barechested biker, there is a definite homoerotic subtext occurring here (unintended by Anger), as there was with Anger's first film "Fireworks" where Anger played a 17-year-old kid who dreams of being sodomized and beaten by Navy officers. There is one shot in "Scorpio" of the barechested biker standing over a cone pointing to his crotch. Most of "Scorpio Rising" has sexual connotations in every shot, especially the Halloween party where costumed, masked guests stand around mimicking sexual gestures, though not with their genitalia clearly exposed as I had initially thought (the version I saw had such moments seemingly blotted out since it was a copy of a copy from a Japanese laserdisc).

"Scorpio Rising" combines elements of teen rebellion, popular culture, Nazi ideology, the motorcycle cult, sex, rock n' roll, religion, and death and it twists such elements around to form a rather haunting collage about the inevitable decline of the western civilization as we know it. And every sequence has a rock and roll song or some sentimental ditty playing on the soundtrack. "Scorpio Rising" is the first film to ever build a montage of shots with songs, and to do so ironically. If you are wondering where Martin Scorsese, Quentin Tarantino, Paul Thomas Anderson, Wes Anderson and any filmmaker since, not to mention MTV, got their ideas for their famous use of ironic pop songs as subtext or montage, look no further back than "Scorpio Rising." Another ironic fact is that the film was brought up on obscenity charges back in 1964, yet no one noticed the use of songs in the soundtrack which Anger had no permission to use. Since then, the film has been tough to find in video stores because the rights to such songs are still in a legal tangle. (UPDATE: Apparently, the use of the songs was licensed by Anger by way of an attorney and it cost Anger $8,000. On video and Japanese laserdisc, the legal tangle may have been initiated, as is the case with most films with songs in their soundtracks, i.e. "Yellow Submarine"). 

"Scorpio Rising" is a frenetically charged, highly potent piece of cinema and it is guaranteed to still provoke anger (especially the use of the swastika symbol). It was a sign of things to come, long before the advent of the post-60's youth rebellion in films such as "The Graduate," or youth violence in "A Clockwork Orange." There is of course the nineties equivalent of both in "Natural Born Killers." It all began with Anger's film, and we can either be grateful or unforgiving. 

Lumet's canny, crafty lenses

SIDNEY LUMET (1924-2011)

The former Dead-End kid who created some indelible films

By Jerry Saravia

Sidney Lumet passed away at the age of 86 on Saturday, April 9th, 2011. One of the great film directors of all time, Sidney Lumet was an accomplished craftsman and an actor's director. He wanted the performances to be the attention-getters, not the visual style or the camera movements. He has been called a director with no signature style but I beg to differ. His style may have been invisible but it is a style. He didn't simply set up a camera and record actors in front of it in a stagy, non-confrontational manner. Not so, in fact, Lumet was all about the lenses. The relationship between the spaces confined to the actors and the spaces surrounding them, especially in tighter and tighter corners as in his amazing film debut, "12 Angry Men," is accomplished by the choice of lenses to tell the story. "Different lenses tell different stories," as he remarked to host James Lipton on the "Inside the Actor's Studio" show.

That brings us to his seminal film, the best damn media satire ever written, "Network" from 1976, which is cold and abrasive, spectacularly funny and darkly serious, and about as prescient a film as it was when it first burst onto to the cinema screens. "Network" is about how the television news organizations have become sullied and demoralized by executives looking for a fast buck - to show the old network geezers that it can make money and be a ratings climber if it just became a "whorehouse." It is not about peddling news, it is about peddling trash or turning something genuine into a freak show minus integrity. The fact that a veteran anchorman, Howard Beale (brilliantly played by the late Peter Finch) has a meltdown on the air in his last show ferments and necessitates a talk show of his own, where he can speak about the truth and tell everyone what they are already thinking -  "I am mad as hell, and I am not going to take it anymore." The reason he gets the show is because a soulless programming director (Faye Dunaway) foresees a ratings hit, considering that Howard Beale's own supposed meltdown became the top story in all the newspapers, easily eclipsing world events (sound familiar?)

Lumet's color and lighting palette in "Network" is subtle, so subtle that it is virtually unseen. As Lumet describes it, the opening scene is virtually shot with very little light when it begins with William Holden as a news producer and Finch joking about an old news story. As the film progresses, more and more lighting patterns emerge - as Lumet had put it, he corrupts the camera ("The movie camera is the fourth star.") By the end of the film, when a decision is made to (*spoiler alert*) assassinate Howard Beale on his own show (still one of the most shocking endings ever seen in a film, no matter how jaded you are), it is all lit as if it were a Ford commercial complete with Robert Duvall slicking his hair back.

Sidney Lumet is known for many other films, all of them primarily set in New York City, yet he has often deviated from police dramas and robbery flicks set in the thick grit of the Empire state. His sole musical, "The Wiz," is a dazzling, entertaining take on "The Wizard of Oz" with just as many memorable songs as the Judy Garland classic. He also crafted a sweet love story called "Lovin' Molly" with Anthony Perkins and Beau Bridges; "The Group" which was a feminist satire saddled with controversial issues from the late 60's; the Eugene O'Neill play that has some of the strongest acting turns in recent history in "Long Day's Journey Into Night"; the highly suspenseful "Deathtrap" with Christopher Reeve in possibly the only performance I've seen of his where he played an insincere manipulator; the tricky and enlightening Agatha Christie melodrama "Murder on the Orient Express"; a 1970 documentary on Martin Luther King, Jr. called "King: A Filmed Record...", among others.

My favorite Lumet pictures would have to be "Network," "Prince of the City," "Murder on the Orient Express," "Dog Day Afternoon," "The Verdict," one of the best courtroom dramas ever made with the stellar Paul Newman, "Running on Empty," which is certainly Lumet's most overpoweringly emotional film, and certainly "The Anderson Tapes" which features a spectacular debut by a young Christopher Walken. I admire "Serpico" but it is not nearly as revelatory as it was in 1973, if for no other reason than the fact that police corruption has grown more complicated than the film shows. "Q & A" has an awful soundtrack (songs by Ruben Blades whom I don't think much of) and is far less enticing than Lumet's other police dramas, including the improbable yet diverting "Night Falls on Manhattan." "Family Business" is simply improbable all around with an even worse soundtrack by Cyle Coleman, though the film is saved by the memorable performances of Sean Connery (a frequent Lumet collaborator), Dustin Hoffman and Matthew Broderick. "The Morning After" and "A Stranger Among Us" are simply bad pictures with none of the magic of Lumet - his remake of John Cassevetes' "Gloria" is a horrendously and unintentionally campy joke of a movie and worth seeing for that reason alone (nothing wrong with watching Sharon Stone running around the NYC streets in high heels).

"Network," though, is the film of Sidney Lumet's career, showcasing him at the height of his directorial powers with a fantastic script by the late Paddy Chayefsky. It is a masterful film, bleak and funny, with William Holden, Robert Duvall, Peter Finch and Faye Dunaway giving the performances of their lives. More than that, it is a scary, angry picture about how the news became corrupted and transformed into trashy entertainment, for the sake of ratings. The film itself is the very definition of satire, and I think Lumet was the only director that could've made it. Sidney Lumet - an accomplished craftsman, an actor's director and, yes, he had a signature style. The former Dead End Kid had a style all his own after all. 

A Room with a Greenscreen View

THE ROOM (2003)

Reviewed by Jerry Saravia

"You can cry, you can express yourself, but please don’t hurt each other. And that’s basically the theme of the movie. It’s a lesson to do better. Because we are better. We are much more intelligent." - Tommy Wiseau

I cannot give "The Room" a rating of any kind. Reasons are aplenty but the most singularly good reason I can think of is that this is not a movie. It has no real story, no narrative structure, no sense of style or semblance of anything resembling something you would pop in your DVD player or run through a projector. I've seen the late Stan Brakhage's own experimental, non-narrative films that confound many, but they seem to take place on Planet Earth and they are about something! "The Room" is nothing - a vacuum of nothingness. A Hoover vacuum cleaner has more to say. Throwing out the trash is an actual action a human being commits."The Room" is inactive, and inexcusably nothing. And yet it is so damn watchable, like a guy wearing rags, dragging a shopping cart and screaming about socialism! (Thank you, Woody Allen).

Tommy Wiseau is the actor-writer-director of this thing we call a movie. He looks vaguely Eastern European and speaks or rather warbles lines of dialogue like "You are tearing me apart, Lisa!," only with less conviction than Bugs Bunny. Tommy plays Johnny, a successful banker who lives in a condo of the "Red Shoes Diaries" variety with his fiancee, Lisa (18-year-old Juliette Danielle). He buys her roses and they have lots of sex. Sometimes a kid next door named Denny (Philip Haldiman) wants to get in bed with them...so they can all throw pillows at each other! When Johnny doesn't get his promotion at the bank, things go awry with Lisa and the movie. Lisa has relations with Johnny's best friend, Mark (Greg Sestero), and she occasionally sweeps the floor when she isn't having a romp in the hay. Johnny gets wind of what is happening and records Lisa's phone conversations. Then we have endless scenes on the roof of the condo that looks like a studio; more soft-core sex scenes; inarticulate and unintentionally funny lines of dialogue; some football passes; an elongated party sequence and a shocking finale. This is the "kind" of movie where someone gets shot in the head and all a character can exclaim is, "are you okay?" This is also the "kind" of movie where a psychologist is almost thrown out of the roof of a building and the person who attempts the murder says, "I'm sorry."

Wiseau is the unusual case in most independently financed features - he spent close to 6 million to finance this picture, including buying two cameras (one 35mm, and the other a high-definition camera) and his own studio (Most indie filmmakers would dream of such an opportunity). However, Wiseau still shoots scenes on a mock-up of a San Francisco apartment rooftop with greenscreen! Amazingly, "The Room" first sought life as a play and a novel (neither of which became a reality) culminating in a screenplay that Wiseau spent five years writing. I am surprised it didn't take him five minutes.

I'd almost rate "The Room" as a good-bad movie but I can't. I don't know what it is. To me, it is the equivalent of an artist, from a while ago, who crafted a blank canvas and called it "The Rose." He may as well have called it "The Room."

The Raging Bull of cinema

SCORSESE - The Ultimate Raging Bull of Soul-Searching:

 A BRIEF REVIEW OF MARTIN SCORSESE'S FILMS from 1968-1989

By Jerry Saravia

WHO'S THAT KNOCKING AT MY DOOR? (1968) - Martin Scorsese's film debut (as well as Harvey Keitel's) is an astounding piece of work, shot in black-and-white, and as gritty as Mean Streets. Keitel plays J.R., an Italian-American youth who fools around with his buddies, goes to Church occasionally, and dates a young, seemingly virginal woman (Zina Bethune).
The film contains themes of Catholic guilt, the Madonna whore complex, and men treating women as whores that became further developed in Marty's later works. One heck of a debut for a man who clearly had a vision, just as his mentor John Cassavetes did in his debut, Shadows. 

THE BIG SHAVE (1968): One of Scorsese's bloodiest parables, and all done in the space of six minutes. The short film concerns a young man who enters a bathroom and proceeds to shave. Each time he picks up the razor, he cuts himself, and continues to until his face becomes full of cuts. Then he cuts his throat, and we see blood filling up the sink.
Tough to withstand, this film may seem pointless until you realize the man cannot stop cutting himself - what makes it tougher to watch is that it is set in a brightly lit white bathroom. All this is accompanied by the music of Bunny Berigan's big-band rendition of "I Can't Get Started." Scorsese ends the film with a title card that reads, "Viet 67." Obviously, this was intended to be an anti-Vietnam war statement...and on that level, it succeeds. It is as frighteningly compelling as anything Scorsese has ever done. A must-see.
Note: The film was first screened at the New York Film Festival in 1968. 


BOXCAR BERTHA (1972) -  Based on the book Sister of the Road by Boxcar Bertha Thomson, this was Scorsese's only exploitation picture, from the Roger Corman studios, and it shows. David Carradine and Barbara Hershey play Depression-era bank robbers in the Bonnie and Clyde style mode, leading to the inevitable violent showdown where Carradine is crucified (Christ-like) on a boxcar! And that was in the original script, not an invention by Marty.
An interesting curio with decent performances and good production values, though it contains little of Scorsese's thematic concerns. Cassavetes apparently hated the film, calling it a piece of garbage, thus leading Scorsese to do something more personal - "Mean Streets."
Choice cameos by Scorsese, as one of Bertha's dates, and the always grand John Carradine.  

MEAN STREETS (1973) - The first of Scorsese's gangster pictures, focusing on New York small-time hoods led by the sympathetic Charlie (Harvey Keitel) and his fraternal relationship with the loose cannon, Johnny Boy (Robert De Niro), who is causing all kinds of trouble in the neighborhood, including blowing up mailboxes. And there's Charlie's complex relationship with Johnny's cousin (Amy Robinson, who later became a full-time producer).
A superb, groundbreaking film with enough grit and noirish atmosphere to have influenced a whole new generation of filmmakers, which it did. Its noirish roots can be felt in the need for the characters to break out of the city, unable to since there is no real escape. An excellent soundtrack full of oldies and Rolling Stone tunes, including "Jumpin' Jack Flash." In terms of mixing music to image perfectly, no one can listen to "Be My Baby" and not think of the scene where Keitel's head rests on a pillow.
Note: Thanks to Scorsese's amazing direction, most of it was shot in Los Angeles.
Mean Streets full-length review 

ITALIANAMERICAN (1974): One of Scorsese's best-known documentaries - a poignant, revealing look at his parents, Charles and Martin Scorsese, as they outline their roots all the way back to Italy. Charles speaks mostly of the clothing business, and how he was brought up by his parents to take care of the family. Catherine speaks of recipes for delicious Italian foods and family squabbling (at the end of the film, a complete recipe for one of her dishes is given). And both Charles and Catherine have a little problem with sitting close to another. The squabble over how wine was made, by the way, is truly funny.
Martin stays behind the scenes but he does share a few scenes with his parents at the dinner table and on the couch. "Italianamerican" is one hell of a documentary with moments of truth, humor, insight and sadness about New York City from the point-of-view of Italians searching for a better life in America. An exceptional treat for Scorsese fans. 

ALICE DOESN'T LIVE HERE ANYMORE (1974) - Ellen Burstyn is Alice, a married woman in Tucson who has an abusive, lonely husband (Billy Green Bush) and a precocious, inquisitive son (Alfred Lutter III). After the husband dies in a truck accident, Alice and her son leave for Monterey, making some other stops along the way, including working at a diner. There she meets and falls in love with a rancher (Kris Kristofferson), who may not be any less abusive.
A road movie and a realistic drama about a woman's feminist attitudes, considered controversial for its time. Burstyn deservedly won an Oscar for Best Actress. Still, an even better feminist statement was made with AN UNMARRIED WOMAN with Jill Clayburgh.
Note: Look for a young Laura Dern sitting at the diner, a stoned Jodie Foster, and a scary, Max Cady-like Harvey Keitel as one of Alice's suitors.


TAXI DRIVER (1976) - As far as I am concerned, "Taxi Driver" is the best American film ever made, a haunting, poetic, harsh look at a dangerous man sick of the cities and the people who inhabit them. De Niro plays Travis Bickle, a lonely cab driver who seeks solace in porno theatres and watching TV soap operas. He tries to befriend a lovely WASP (Cybill Shepherd), but his idea of a date is to take her to one of those porn theatres and watch The Swedish Marriage Manual.

Travis can't sleep and gets constant headaches. He tries to protect a 12-year-old prostitute (Jodie Foster) from Sport (Harvey Keitel), "the scum of the earth," and he's slowly consumed by the idea of killing a presidential candidate.

Expertly performed, powerfully written by Paul Schrader (who later collaborated on other Scorsese projects), and brilliantly scored by the late Bernard Hermann (his last score). The film is genuinely disturbing, provocative, challenging and violent, offering little solutions yet probed with many questions. It's also the most evocative portrait of loneliness in a big city ever made (so much that it persuaded an obsessed John Hinckley to attempt to assassinate President Reagan). And the most important line in the film is not "Are you talking to me?" It's the line that follows: "I'm the only one here." As prophetic today as it was in 1976, and it was a minor hit back then too.

Look for a cameo by Scorsese as one of Travis's psychotic fares, and he can be spotted fleetingly when Cybill arrives at her office in slow-motion.

NEW YORK, NEW YORK (1977) - One of Marty's least successful efforts, a downbeat "noir" musical starring De Niro as a saxophonist, and the sparkling Liza Minnelli as the torch singer whom he falls in love with.
A dry, dull film with some exciting production numbers and artificial sets, yet the performances are listless and the story numbing (Barry Primus and Dick Miller are the only ones who seems alive). De Niro seems to be doing riffs on his Travis Bickle character. The whole mess smells of a largely improvised film that partly helped to put the nail in the coffin of experimenting with big-budget flicks that didn't financially break even ("Star Wars" came out the same year and it was a phenomenal success). Still, it is always a pleasure to hear Liza singing the title number and I appreciate the fact that Scorsese intended on doing a noir musical. 

AMERICAN BOY: A PROFILE OF: STEVEN PRINCE (1978) -

 Full-length review

THE LAST WALTZ (1978) - The Band's last concert is thrillingly realized by Scorsese, full of whiz-bang songs performed by numerous singers and groups, including the coked-up Neil Diamond, the dazzling Staples, Dr. John, Muddy Waters, etc. There's also much back room intrigue and personal stories told by the members of the group about life on the road. A great concert film, as joyous and uplifting as any other made since. 

RAGING BULL (1980) - A genuine Scorsese/De Niro masterpiece featuring one of the most brutally honest behavioral portraits ever made. De Niro is Jake La Motta, a fierce boxer, who fights his own demons at home with his blonde, angelic wife (Cathy Moriarty), the Madonna-whore, and his repugnant brother (a curly-haired Joe Pesci), who serves as his manager.
A sad, unredeeming portrait of macho and masochistic behavior, its chief aim being an anti-macho and anti-masochistic portrait. Film is complemented with stark black-and-white cinematography (La Motta pictured his life in black-and-white), incredibly vivid boxing scenes, and some beautifully composed dramatic scenes (the swimming pool scene with Moriarty is exquisite). De Niro gives one of his greatest performances, and looks unrecognizable in the second half as he gained weight to portray the fat, unfunny comic La Motta later became. De Niro won the Best Actor Oscar for his performance, and Thelma Schoonmaker won for Best Film Editing. Scorsese still didn't pick up an Oscar for his direction, losing to Robert Redford's debut, Ordinary People.
Look for a young John Turturro in one of the first club scenes. 

THE KING OF COMEDY (1983) - This unnerving black comedy was the biggest flop of the year in the U.S. It became, however, as prophetic about American celebrities as you can imagine. De Niro, this time, plays a comic named Rupert Pupkin ("Is it Pumpnick or Pumpkin?") who desperately wants to be a guest on the Jerry Langford show (a take-off on The Johnny Carson Show). Jerry (a wonderfully restrained Jerry Lewis) tells him to just call the office. Rupert calls, and calls, and calls, and Jerry doesn't return any of his messages. He gets so frustrated that he kidnaps Jerry Langford! That's one way to get a spot. And the irony is that Rupert becomes a celebrity!
The movie wavers between comedy and black humor with ease, and it is shrewdly written by former film critic/Newsweek writer, Paul Zimmermann. Although the film is sometimes uneven, it is brilliantly performed by De Niro, Sandra Bernhard, and Jerry Lewis. An underrated classic, and the first Scorsese film I ever saw. So bizarre and offbeat that I saw it countless times ever since...and it made me into the Scorsese fanatic I am today.
Note: Besides playing a television director, Scorsese appears ever so fleetingly as he sits in a van, just before Langford is verbally abused by a woman at a phone booth. 


AFTER HOURS (1985) - The quintessential New York nightmare - a lonely computer programmer (perfectly cast Griffin Dunne) meets a date (Rosanna Arquette) in SOHO that turns into more than just the date from hell. He encounters jealous boyfriends, S&M freaks, Cheech and Chong, irate cab drivers, untrustworthy ice cream vendors, vigilante mobs, and loses his money thus making it difficult for him to pay train fare.
"After Hours" is the first of many rewarding collaborations with gifted cinematographer Michael Ballhaus (he also shot films for Fassbinder), and it is full of bizarre zooms and quick tracking shots (you'll never see a pair of keys falling from a second-story window the same way again). Add to that, a strong, empathetic, believable performance by Dunne (who has been treading the same innocent leading man waters ever since), and one delirious haphazard situation after another (a precursor to the maddening, repetitive situations in "Bringing Out the Dead"). Anxiety is what drives the narrative forward. If you live in New York, you'll understand.
Note: Scorsese appears at a punk night club as he adjusts a spotlight aimed at Griffin Dunne while Bad Brains' frenzied song  "Pay to Cum" is heard.


MIRROR, MIRROR (1985)- Scorsese's only television film, an episode from Steven Spielberg's short-lived series Amazing Stories. "Mirror, Mirror" stars Sam Waterston as Jordan, a highly popular Stephen King-like novelist who begins seeing visions of a horribly scarred monster wearing a black hat and cape (played by Tim Robbins). The monster is visible only when Jordan looks at mirror surfaces, specifically mirrors in his own apartment. Is he paranoid, or is his horrific visions from his stories coming to haunt him? Jordan seeks solace from his ex-wife (beautifully played by Helen Shaver, who also appeared in "Color of Money").
All the classic elements of Scorsese are in place here, and most evocatively portrayed is the sense of loneliness. Jordan's apartment looks just as cold and sterile as Jerry Langford's in "The King of Comedy," and he also lives alone to boot. In fact, there is one scene of a fan, a supposedly aspiring writer, who waits for Jordan at his doorstep and is angrily asked to leave - shades of "King of Comedy" once again. "Mirror, Mirror" is a classic short film, utilizing all the tricks up Scorsese's sleeve to make a terrific paranoia tale. The ending is shockingly abrupt and appropriately ambiguous.
Note: Look for Harry Northup as the security guard - he also appeared in "Mean Streets" and "Taxi Driver." You will also notice that dutch close-ups of locking windows and doors were also used in "Cape Fear." 

THE COLOR OF MONEY (1986)- A thrilling sequel to Robert Rossen's bleak The Hustler, set 20 years later with an older, wiser Fast Eddie Felson (Paul Newman), a liquor salesman whose knack for pool-playing is reignited by a young, hot-headed pool player, Vincent (Tom Cruise). Under Felson's tutelage, Vincent plays the big pool tournament, learning that sometimes losing is winning.
Scorsese's only sequel in his repertoire is flashy and elegant, and smartly written by Richard Price (Clockers). Major drawback: an unsatisfying, Rocky-like ending with no payoff and a thinly layered Oscar-nominated role for Mary Elizabeth Manstrantonio as Vince's smart girlfriend. 


THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST (1988)- A satisfyingly religious experience and the mostly deeply personal of Scorsese's works. Based on Nikos Kazantzakis's novel, Willem Dafoe stars as Jesus Christ, who begins to doubt and question his place on earth as the son of God. He also develops amorous feelings for Mary Magdalene (Barbara Hershey), and fantasizes a married life with her.
The most controversial of St. Marty's films (there were picket lines denouncing the film) - deeply spiritual and moving. The crucifixion sequence is a stunner, and it is miles ahead of Mel Gibson's amazingly popular THE PASSION OF THE CHRIST.

 
NEW YORK STORIES: LIFE LESSONS (1989) - An anthology of the Big Apple, told through three different stories. The first one is the best, directed by Scorsese, about an arrogant artist, Lionel Dobie (Nick Nolte), faced with finished his latest masterpiece, and the complicated relationship that ensues with his assistant (Rosanna Arquette) whom he pines for. She also fuels his work, and his ego.
"Life Lessons" is a striking example of how to make a short film: Scorsese uses odd camera angles, an extensive number of dolly shots, and freeze frames to demonstrate the artistic side of Lionel. Every artist I've talked to loves this film because it is about them. Nowhere is this made more evident than when Lionel says, "You make art because you have to. So it isn't about talent, it is about no choice but to do it. You give it up. If you give it up, then you weren't a real artist to begin with."
Memorable cameos by Steve Buscemi and Blondie, and if you're quick, you can spot Scorsese and his mentor, the late Michael Powell! 

MORE ON SCORSESE at http://jerrysaravia.blogspot.com/2011/08/raging-of-bull-of-cinema-part-2.html