Massacre Laid me Down to Sleep

THE RETURN OF THE TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE (1994)

Reviewed by Jerry Saravia

A week ago, I watched the engrossing documentary "The American Nightmare," a compelling study of how society and world events can sometimes shape a horror film's scare factor. It was fascinating and introspective, particularly director Tobe Hooper's comments on what made the original "Texas Chainsaw Massacre" possible (a description about lack of gas in one scene mirrored the country's own lack of a precious commodity). Watching "The Return of the Texas Chainsaw Massacre" (also known as "The Next Generation"), I can safely say that nothing in this film was influenced by anything except greed.

Well, there is one other factor. The film posits the theory that Kennedy was not killed by the goverment but by crazy backwoods people! That is certainly a new theory, unworthy of much speculation. And who would have thought that Leatherface would listen to his intended victim by sitting down at the dinner table and keeping his mouth shut! And how does a prom queen, who is visibly impaled on a meat hook, able to drag herself out of the dreaded cannibals' house with no visible blood spillage? And how about Matthew McConaughey as the most over-the-top ex-CIA agent-cum-cannibal in history whose right leg runs on batteries and keeps a slew of remote controls in his pockets! And if nothing is as deadly awful as that, how about Renee Zellweger as the mousy virgin who at one points makes a declaration that even Marilyn Chambers in the original wouldn't have thought of: "I am leaving right now!" Well, she almost makes it. Interestingly, I might have overstated one fact: this new family doesn't seem to be interested in cannibalism. They just want to scare the living daylights out of their victims.

The original "Texas Chainsaw Massacre" is a nightmarish masterpiece of unblinking, unrelieving terror that still gives me goosebumps. I would have preferred revisiting it than watching yet another poorly conceived and downright unwatchable sequel. Another cartoonish sequel like this and Leatherface will have his own Saturday morning cartoon.