He has a real knack for survival

 OCTOPUSSY (1983)
Reviewed by Jerry Saravia

Back in 1983, I was so excited to see a new James Bond adventure at the theater down the street from where I lived that I ran and climbed a fence facing a gas station. I climbed it thinking I was James Bond and got a small cut from the spikes at the top of the fence. I still have a small scar below my chest to remind me of the excitement of a 12-year-old seeing "Octopussy." After all these years, "Octopussy" is technically one of the oddest of the Bond films because of its far more exotic locales, action scenes that seem that carry a slight Indiana Jones vibe, an island full of gorgeous women dressed in red jumpsuits, and near-parodic moments that will tickle your funny bone. The plot isn't complicated though I am not sure how much sense it makes. 

Roger Moore still returns as the dapper James Bond, 007 with a license to kill and a license to charm your socks off. Opening pre-title sequence is almost as good as any Moore Bond film, in fact probably just as exciting as the goofy "Moonraker," with Bond in disguise as a Latin American general whose mission is to blow up a military base. The minijet that Bond escapes in while being chased by a tracking missile is truly exciting enough to make you grab the arms of your seat. Following that dazzling opener, we get an agent 009 dressed as a clown who is killed by twin assassins who can throw a knife like nobody's business. Apparently 009 was clutching a fake Faberge egg and Bond attends an auction where the same Faberge egg is to be sold. Needless to say, after some swapping of eggs, the mission is to find out why an Afghan prince named Kamal Khan (Louis Jordan, as suave as Moore) bid and won the egg and what all this has to do with a mad Soviet general (Steven Berkoff) and the aforementioned island of women (and crocodiles) where a jewel smuggling operation exists - essentially, priceless jewels in exchange for fake ones. There is also a nuclear bomb threat where a probable scenario of the Soviet Union arming itself while the U.S. is blamed for the bomb and NATO removes nuclear weapons from Europe, and blah and blah and blah. Truth be told, the hotbed of political strife is a bit tough to digest so let's say, it is one country being scapegoated over an international incident. 

I don't necessarily watch James Bond movies for political intrigue in as much as spirited, inspired action, a few gadgets from our lovable Q, and a hero we can root for. Roger Moore fits the bill with wit and poise - he's not my favorite Bond yet he was always an inspired choice. Bond ultimately has to disarm a bomb and only has minutes to do it in. That makes more sense than the mad general thinking he might be seen as hero for the Soviet Union. In terms of action scenes, they are extraordinary and virtually implausible. Whether it is Bond fighting villains on board a fast train, hiding inside a gorilla costume to evade an enemy, dressed as a clown at a circus, hanging on for dear life at high elevations on a small Cesna-like plane, beating Kamal Khan at backgammon (okay, that is probable), or being driven inside a three-wheeled "company car" in New Delhi while being chased by the bad guys where a camel almost does a double take, or the yo-yo saw that could slice our Bond into four different Bonds and so on. You know what to expect and the movie delivers expertly on all sorts of thrills, chills and spills. The humor quotient is higher than usual too including having Vijay (played by real-life tennis player Vijay Amritraj), an MI6 ally, play the 007 theme with a flute! Say what? Or Bond telling a ferocious tiger to "Sittttt!" Or Q being kissed by those voluptuous women!

The villains are engaging though not as dangerous as in previous Bond films (or for that matter, Klaus Maria Brandeur who appeared in that same 1983 summer's other Bond film, "Never Say Never Again"). I should not exclude mentioning Maud Adams as Octopussy, the wealthy jewel smuggler on that island of women, who definitely holds our attention - she's good company with Roger Moore. Jordan is the very essence of a dry martini - he can be stirred but not shaken. Kudos to Walter Gotell as KGB General Anatol Gogol, a familiar presence since he played this same character in a few of Moore's Bond pictures. And I do like the fierce, haunting eyes of Kabir Bedi as Gobinda, Khan's bodyguard who can crush dice into fine powder. Not enough to crush Bond's face because Bond survives with almost no scratches through one cliffhanging episode after another. He survives virtually unscathed (except for a broken arm and leg which miraculously does not stop him from making love to Octopussy). This is not a serious James Bond movie but it is definitely delicious buckets of fun.