Good evening, my name is Paul Rudd and I am in Halloween 6!

HALLOWEEN: THE CURSE OF MICHAEL MYERS (1995)

Reviewed by Jerry Saravia

 (Originally written in 1996)

It has been over twenty years since the original "Halloween" film, which spawned several terrible imitators and endless sequels. The Michael Myers character in the first film was shrouded in mystery since we didn't know what his motivation was or why he chose to revisit his hometown of Haddonfield where he killed his sister. Michael was unspeakably evil - an inhuman monster walking at a snail's pace and seemingly indestructible. The John Carpenter original remains a classic, scary, imaginative, low-budget independent film with a great, heroic role by a very young Jamie Lee Curtis. After "Halloween II," however, the series became repetitive and unnecessarily gory - a never-ending spectacle for witnessing the numerous methods Michael employed in killing his latest victims (post Number 2, only "Halloween 5" had some decent chills). 1995's "Halloween: The Curse of Michael Myers" is so awful that it defies description and also wants to offer explanations for Michael's behavior - questions better left unanswered.

The opening scene is promising. A young woman carries her baby outside of a dank hospital and drives away in rainy weather. She stops at an empty bus station. A shadow appears and a white mask emerges from the shadow. It's of course Michael with a big glinting knife! Oh, well, it seemed promising. The woman in this opening sequence is Michael Myers' niece from the last two "Halloween" pictures, but who cares?

Michael goes back to Haddonfield since the Halloween season is around the corner again. A dysfunctional family has the misfortune of living at the former Myers house where Michael killed his sister (Kim Darby is one of the family members in denial over her husband's abuse). Wait a minute. If the house was boarded up and considered haunted by the townsfolk, why would anyone want to renovate it and resell it? Haven't these people heard of Amityville before? The plot thickens. If you are one of two people who has seen "Halloween 5," you'll recall the mysterious character with a black cloak and hat who rescues Michael from prison in the ludicrous finale. That mysterious stranger (no doubt, a homage to the Shadow) is back, and apparently runs the ominous hospital we see at the beginning and, get this (*spoilers ahead*), Michael Myers works for him!

Paul Rudd ("The Cider House Rules") appears in the role of the little kid whom Laurie babysitted in the original film. Now he's all grown-up and looks rather creepy. He claims to know why Michael Myers is indestructible and is aware that Myers' wrath is about to be set off again, thanks to complex charts that revolve around the Druids! Poor Donald Pleasance in, sadly, his last role as Dr. Loomis returns as a man who has retired and is living in isolation. Still, he decides to get rid of Michael one more time thanks to Mr. Rudd. What for? The monster couldn't be killed after five sequels so what makes Loomis think he can kill him now.

Marianne Hagan plays Kara Strode, Laurie's cousin, who lives in that dreaded Myers home. She suffers abuse from her father (Bradford English), who is the most rotten sonofabitch on earth that you know with certainty he will not last long. Hagan is competent in her role, though one wishes there was more for her to do.

"Halloween" The Curse of Michael Myers" exists in two versions, one is a producer's cut that has forty minutes of restored footage, an alternate (and sillier) ending and new music. It is considered the superior version but all I can say is that it is as poorly made, amateurishly acted, unscary and unsuspenseful as the theatrical version. The fact is that this "Curse" should have ended the franchise for good and ever but no. One more sequel with Jamie Lee returning surfaced in 1998 (much superior to most any other sequel) not to mention yet another sequel with Jamie Lee again! The "Halloween" movie series interests me because I keep hoping someone will return to the dread and atmosphere of the first two films. Probably the scariest element of "Curse" is that Donald Pleasance saw it fit to reprise his tired Dr. Loomis role. A curse, indeed.