Swift, swift, and away

GULLIVER'S TRAVELS (2010) 

RevieweD by Jerry Saravia

When I first read Jonathan Swift's satirical classic, "Gulliver Travels," I was blown away by the political threads in it and at how unkind those Lilliputians were (to be fair, the Lilliputs are only in the first part of a four-part story). Alas, this umpteenth version of the story has little to remind anyone of the original. It is a cartoonish and gargantuan-sized picture, full of pop-culture references  but it contains something that few children's films seem to possess - it is fun and has a sense of wonder (though not as wondrous as the original source).

Gulliver is a beer-bellied Jack Black who has been working in the mail-room for ten years. He is fond of Darcy, a writer (played by Amanda Peet, whose role seems to have been left on the cutting room floor), but doesn't have the nerve to ask her out. Gulliver is keen on impressing her by pretending to have an interest in travel writing. He even submits a travel piece (plagiarized from several "Time Out" articles) and actually goes on the voyage of a lifetime to the Bermuda Triangle. That is until there is a raging storm and a watery vortex that takes him to the land of Lilliput where everyone speaks with words that end in "eth" (the epitome of wit in this movie, which is fine because it makes one wish someone included it in "The Princess Bride"). Gulliver wakes up in a beach tied down by the Lilliputs and that is where Swift begins and ends (The Voyage to Brobdingnag where Gulliver is pint-sized in a land of giants is given short-shrift here with Gulliver forced to wear a dress in a doll house).

Most of "Gulliver's Travels" is not interested in corrupt human beings, misanthropy or European government criticisms. In fact, this film stays in the land of Lilliput where everything is commercialized (by Gulliver) and where Jack Black can do battle with a fleet of ships by flexing his belly to deflect cannonballs. Gulliver stages a KISS concert, the Star Wars trilogy with Lilliput actors, has a fight scene with a giant Transformer with a helping of Iron Man, and helps the sweet-tempered Horatio (Jason Segel) woo the most beautiful princess in the land, Princess Mary (Emily Blunt). Yeppers, we are in Princess Bride waters here.

I enjoyed "Gulliver's Travels" but it is so far removed from anything Swiftian that it might seem like a bastardized adaptation. It is bastardized but it is also an engaging bastardization with an overall appealing cast (Jason Segel and Emily Blunt perform with zest). It is a big, colorful, crude cartoon that Warner Bros. might have tried back in the day with Bugs Bunny and friends, but there is no hint of satire here at all. Jack Black fans, like myself, will enjoy it a lot more than Jonathan Swift fans.

Smurf on this

THE SMURFS (2011)

Reviewed by Jerry Saravia

 

I know that a live-action film based on the Belgian-created little blue people is technically targeted at kids, but it also assumes that someone like me, who grew into a teenager during the 1980's when the little blue thingies had an animated series, is also targeted at my nostalgia. So my thoughts are that the first feature-length "Smurfs" movie is basically fun and a little shapeless but fun all the same, aimed at the kid in all of us. Nothing wrong with that.

The Smurfs are the 3-apple high Blue People who live in mushroom houses in the middle of the woods and invisible to the naked eye. There is Clumsy Smurf, Brainy Smurf, Gutsy Smurf, Grouchy Smurf, Chef Smurf, etc. Papa Smurf leads the clan, and there is the one anomaly in the male-dominated group, the adorable female Smurfette (voiced by Katy Perry). Thanks to evil and clumsy wizard Gargamel (played by a live, non-animated human, Hank Azaria), the Smurfs' village is under siege by the wizard and his evil, snarling cat. During their escape, the Blue Kids find themselves sucked into a vortex that lands them in New York City. Why there is a vortex that leads to the Big Apple, I do not understand but I am not looking for logic here (something similar happens in the far superior and magical film, "Enchanted").

So the Smurfs find themselves running around New York and Neil Patrick Harris's apartment (Harris plays a marketing expert), trying in vain to elude the evil Gargamel. Eventually the evil wizard kidnaps Papa Smurf and hopes to remove his "Smurf essence" (What?) with the aid of a dragon wand that will make the wizard more powerful! Right, sure.

I loved the opening sequence of "The Smurfs" so much that I had hoped it would remain there. Instead the film's four screenwriters decide to send the Blue Kids to New York, and so we get some inspired cameos from Liz Smith, Joan Rivers and Tim Gunn (the most inspired). Sofia Vergara is fun for a while though her role in this film is misguided and confused - either she is not bitchy enough or the writers forgot to make her bitchier when she threatens to fire Harris's character through a text! Neil Patrick Harris seems like he is in a daze but I did enjoy his slapstick pratfalls (though he could have used some of the wit he brings to his TV show, "How I Met Your Mother").

The Smurfs are fun to watch (the Scottish Gutsy Smurf - a new Smurf - is my favorite) and are animated through CGI technology in such a way that pays tribute to the animated series, instead of having them jump around frantically like so many other CGI animated pictures that combine live-action (cueing Mr. Garfield Kitty). The movie gets a bit tedious (Smurf this, Smurf that, only so much I can take) but there is a hint of devilish wit in the few scenes between Gargamel and Sofia Vergara. As I said before, there is something for the kids and something for the adults.

Annie tastes good this year

FOXES (1980)

Reviewed by Jerry Saravia

 

Discriminating viewers and parents might scoff at "Foxes" and wonder why the kids are so miserable in this film that they resort to alcoholic binges. Actually, only one kid suffers the most - the others are simply trying to grow up and go with the flow. That is the basis for "Foxes" and the elegiac little masterpiece of neon-lit, punk youth nirvana, "Times Square" (both films came out the same year and did not make much of a splash at the box-office). "Foxes" is not a masterpiece of film but it is a canny, observant, sensitive portrayal of teenagers in the San Fernando Valley.

Jodie Foster is Jeanie, the seeming matriarch in her group of friends who sleep at each other's houses and try to survive in an adult world. We do not see them in school much but we do see how they relate to each other. Jeanie cares about her friends and listens, especially to her skateboarding pal, Brad (Scott Baio). There is also the boy-crazy Deirdre (Kandice Stroh) who has her eyes set on a supermarket bagger; the virginal Madge (Marilyn Kagan) who pines for an older man, Jay (Randy Quaid); and the very troubled teenage runaway, Annie (Cherie Currie) who wants to shut out her abusive father who happens to be a police officer. Jeanie also has her hands full with her single, frustrated mother (Sally Kellerman), who is also attending college, and her emotionally distant father who is a tour manager for the rock band Angel. Jeanie's main concern is the safety of the pill-polling, frequently wasted Annie.   

Nobody in this movie is the least bit interested in school. These kids drive around town, hang out in construction sites or waterways, go to concerts, and get drunk. Parents are almost an afterthought but these teenage kids do not reflect any sort of anomie - they are trying to find their identity, their purpose in the moment. Jeanie seems the most mature, Madge wants to grow up too fast, Annie is simply a lost soul, and Brad wants to be romantically involved with Annie.

"Foxes" is extraordinarily shot and directed by Adrian Lyne (his debut film). He has an improvisatory eye for naturalism, relying on making the film an almost documentary-like expose with soft lighting (his visual trademark). Lyne also knows how to make the most of a scene, especially a dinner party that turns realistically frightening when too many teenagers show up and cause a ruckus (most 80's teen comedy-dramas can't quite match a scene like the one Lyne stages). Scenes with Annie are also realistically staged with major kudos to ex-Runaways band singer, Cherie Currie, who is explosive in her acting debut. Jodie Foster also delivers the goods with her trademark sympathy and soulfulness. And a scene where Brad tries to escape on a skateboard from a ragtag group of punks almost matches the excitement of similar scenes in "Back to the Future" (wonder if Robert Zemeckis got the idea of a skateboarding Marty McFly from "Foxes.")

"Foxes" is not perfect but it is a solidly sublime, universal and very moving take on what is means to make that transition from teenager to adult in suburbia. And I might not look at a pear tree the same way again.

No Joy in this Yuletide tale

SANTA CLAUS: THE MOVIE (1985)

Reviewed by Jerry Saravia

Director Jeannot Szwarc has not had the greatest track record for movies ("Jaws 2," "Supergirl" - the latter is one of my guilty pleasures) but at least he tries. What he and the Salkind producers had exactly in mind for "Santa Claus: The Movie" is beyond me. A fairly dark opening sequence and fairly crude and downbeat humor make most of the middle section of "It's a Wonderful Life" seem positively upbeat by comparison. This "Santa Claus" is for kids who like coal in their stockings.

Perfectly cast David Huddleston is Claus, a jovial man in his 50's who delivers toys to children in neighboring villages during a horrific blizzard. As we see him and his wife trying to deliver in a sleigh led by two exhausted reindeer, it is the 14th century and this man is not the magical Santa Claus yet. They struggle but the old couple almost die from freezing weather until they are rescued by the Vendequm, who seem to approach them from the Northern Star (this felt quite religious in its symbolism since I thought Baby Jesus' manger was nearby). The Vendequm are the elves from the North Pole who rescue the couple and tell them that Claus is the Chosen One. And the Ancient Elf (Burgess Meredith) bestows his wisdom and off goes Santa and the reindeer to deliver toys on Christmas Eve to the children everywhere, century after century.

At this point, "Santa Claus" does a fine job of detailing the enormity of the Santa Workshop and the dozens of elves who are put to work to make toys from plywood. Patch (Dudley Moore) is the elf who sees the wave of the future in hydraulics and plumbing (he even quips to Santa at their initial meeting that he has an idea about pipes emitting heat!) But when there is the homeless kid in New York City (which Santa seems to think is the only homeless kid in the world) and the introduction of B.Z. (John Lithgow), a greedy toy maker who hires Patch after Patch is demoted from being Santa's assistant, the movie becomes sour and dreary. Even when the film tries to be magical and instill a sense of wonder about Santa, it fails. The movie is cheerier in its early North Pole scenes.

The movie has little time or patience to consider who Santa is. At one point, Santa questions the tradition of Christmas when things go awry with lollipops that make children fly. But when the film shifts to B.Z. and Patch making explosive candy canes, I was lost and felt I was in some other movie. Huddleston does the part with pride, Moore comes off as a colorful enough elf, and Lithgow is a wacky villain with a touch of Lex Luthor (the Salkinds also produced the Superman films, hence the Luthor comparison). I actually wonder why St. Nick at the end of the movie didn't retire or quit. Who needs this much dreariness?

Payne-fully rewarding

SIDEWAYS

Reviewed by Jerry Saravia

Alexander Payne's "Sideways" is one of the most becalming experiences I've had during the 2000 decade - a film as relaxed and assured about its characters and story as any movie released in 2004. It is richly complex and yet so simply told that it shows writer-director Alexander Payne is the foremost expert of human comedies of the early 21st century.

Miles (Paul Giamatti) is the English teacher of a middle school who is hoping to make his big break with an autobiographical novel, entitled "The Day After Yesterday." He is also something of a wine connoisseur and travels to wineries in and around Southern California (just don't mention Merlot to him). He is also divorced and severely unhappy - the kind of guy who can discuss fine wine but is emotionally shut-out from everything else.

Miles's best friend is Jack (Thomas Hayden Church, at the time he was known best for TV's "Wings"), a burly TV actor who has lately succumbed to voice-overs for commercials. He is about to get married and so Miles offers to take Jack away for a week and sample wine. Jack wants to do more than sample wine - he wants to get laid and get Miles laid as well. Miles has no interest in getting laid for many reasons - the most exclusive reason is that he is still in love with his ex-wife. He often calls her when he is drunk. Nevertheless, Jack, the womanizer, wants girly action and hooks up with Stephanie (Sandra Oh), a pour girl at a winery who makes sexual remarks. Before you can say threesome, Miles has caught the fancy of a waitress, Maya (Virginia Madsen), whom he knows from regular visits to the restaurant though he's never had the temerity to ask her out. So Jack does it for him, and the four meet for dinner and go back to Stephanie's house. Miles is an emotional wreck, and even calls his ex-wife at the restaurant. He is not ready for this but, deep down, knows the time has come.

Based on the novel by Rex Pickett, "Sideways" evolves slowly and with complete assuredness. This is a road movie to some degree but it is more than that - it is a drama of simplicity, humor and real big laughs inside of a road movie. Miles and Jack have to confront their own lives, their flaws and foibles. These guys are hardly perfect human beings. Miles takes Xanax and Lexapro for his depression, the daily intake of which has gone down a couple of notches since discovering that his ex-wife has remarried. He also steals money from his mother after a brief birthday visit. He likes Maya and pines for her but his head is too full of longing for his ex-wife and for temperamental pinot noir.

Jack is the uncontrollable party boy who wants Stephanie's body and mistakenly pretends he will live with her and her daughter and run a winery. This trip is his bachelor party, but he's also skating on thin ice since he is engaged and keeps his rings in his wallet. He is charming and loves to mingle, and develops a taste for wine, but he is as immature as most hormonal teenage boys.

"Sideways" is virtually unpredictable from start to finish, and the reason it works so well is because Payne takes his lovable duo from one situation to another free of cliches or sentimentality. Also, there is no real plot so that the story is the characters, and they roam free based on their own desires, needs and wants. This is exactly at the core of Alexander Payne's work, from "Citizen Ruth" to "About Schmidt." He refuses to make the characters anything less than true to themselves. You never feel a heavy hand is directing their actions or making them realize their mistakes so they can be redeemed. What is gained from Miles and Jack is their closer understanding of who they are, and that is the movie's optimistic conclusion.

If it wasn't for the memorable performances by Paul Giammati and Thomas Hayden Church, this film simply wouldn't work. But because Giammati is an expert at showing pain, dramatically and comedically (as in his best work, "American Splendor") and because Church shows the innocent puppy who can't help being the sex addict he is, we are left with two guys we learn to care about, despite their flaws, because they are not afraid to be honest about themselves to each other, and they help each other as a result. So what we have here is the clearest example of a therapeutic road movie that I can think of.

Also worth noting is Virginia Madsen as the waitress Maya, who is going to school to become a horticulturist. She is sympathetic to Miles but also knows where to draw the line with deceitful men. She has a powerfully tender scene where she describes the flavor and taste of wine as if it was something she could fall in love with. It is so tender and sweet that it should earn Madsen more attention than she ever got as an actress.
Sandra Oh (the director's wife) as Stephanie is the only false note in an otherwise flawless film. Though she has a scene of major rage, she is mostly saddled with being a sex magnet for Jack. I never got the impression that she took this sexual odyssey as the makings of a serious relationship, though Jack gives us that idea as does Oh's scene of violent rage.

Seamlessly blended with comedy and drama, "Sideways" is a refreshingly pointed and sublime work. It is further proof that Alexander Payne is so in touch with the human condition that he can do no wrong. Consider him the new crown prince of adult filmmaking, along the lines of the late Hal Ashby and the formidable James L. Brooks. Yes, Virginia, he is that good. And remember, no Merlot.

Unclean, unsafe, and belly still aching

THE HANGOVER (2009)

Reviewed by Jerry Saravia

I had a good time watching "The Hangover." It is often howlingly funny and filled to the brim with rapid-fire gags that range from slapsticky to inexplicable bad taste. But by the end of it, though I was still laughing, I noticed how much of it is laughing at the expense of people who are not easy to like and how I was still reeling over the bad taste in my mouth.

"The Hangover" has a classic situation that is pure gold for any comedy. A groom-to-be, Doug (Justin Batha) is taken for a wild weekend in Las Vegas for an epic bachelor party with his three pals, Phil, a schoolteacher (Bradley Cooper) who is indifferent to marriage; a, dare I say, pussywhipped dentist, Stu (Ed Helms), and the truly offputting and dangerously unpredictable nature of Doug's future brother-in-law (Zach Galifianakis). They stay at the expensive Caesars Palace and the next day, uh, oh, cue the Murphy's Law Syndrome of blackouts in comedies that can, in the right hands, be a state of utter nirvana or a buzzkill. Everything that can go wrong, will go wrong in Sin City. And everything goes wrong. More wrong than you know. Truly, irrevocably, umistakably wrong. So wrong that you ask yourself, how will these men ever right their wrongs? And that is all there is to "The Hangover" - a series of violent pratfalls and misunderstandings that lead to complete chaos.

Directed by Todd Phillips and written by Jon Lucas and Scott Moore (with Phillips scoring an uncredited rewrite), "The Hangover" has a barrel of laughs, everything from Mike Tyson's home surveillance footage to the Asian mob that includes a naked Ken Jeong running around with a crowbar, to Zach Galifianakis's oddball moments of flipping the bird or making strangely somber toasts, to a hungry tiger on the loose in a Vegas suite, to date-rape drugs, Heather Graham frolicking about from a wedding chapel ceremony, and so much more. For true belly laughs, you can't go wrong with "The Hangover." I laughed many times out loud, and sometimes snickered with my eyes wide shut from moments that would make anyone snicker. That may be the problem with "The Hangover overall - too many naughty moments to snicker at.

The acting is expertly done (Ed Helms and Zach Galifianakis are more of a hoot than anyone else in the movie) and the situations these men find themselves in are as bizarre and insane as you can imagine. But the movie left me cold and reeling from all the naughtiness, feeling a little too unclean. Compare this to the chaotic but not as high-pitched, "Road Trip" (also directed by Todd Phillips) and you'll find that the audience was allowed to catch its breath amidst all the chaotic situations in that movie. I am all for raunch and this movie has it in spades but if I am asked to repeat the experience, I might say I am too hung over.

Ho-Ho-Ho Hogan

SANTA WITH MUSCLES (1996)

Reviewed by Jerry Saravia

I know I should have hated "Santa With Muscles." Its got WWE star Hulk Hogan as a self-absorbed fitness guru who conks his head on a Santa statue (do not ask) and thinks he might be Santa Claus but he doesn't know the Santa rules. I know, I know, the film had a brief theatrical release that lasted about as long as "Eddie and the Cruisers II" did, playing in a paltry 98 screens. I know, I know but I have to say that "Santa With Muscles" is enjoyable through most of its screen time. It is modest, pleasant and never screechingly sentimental or too hokey. It is a live-action cartoon and, shudder the thought, it works.

So Hulk Hogan really thinks he is Santa? Yes, thanks to a hired elf at the Santa Cottage in the local shopping mall who is in desperate need of a Santa since the St. Nick stand-in has disappeared (a fact that is never resolved in the entire film). Fifty bucks from a blonde mall employee is all it takes for the elf, Lenny (Danny Stark), to find Hulk Hogan wandering the mall convinced by Lenny that he is Santa. The kids chant "Santa, Santa" and Hulk does his best to please them. The plot thickens when Hulk Hogan realizes he has a mission - to save an orphanage from a villainous Ebner Frost (Ed Begley, Jr.) who has a Howard Hughes germaphobia where he refuses to breathe regular air. Ebner has a keen interest in taking over the orphanage since, below the basement of the building, there is a cavern full of precious, deadly quartz crystals that explode when dropped on the ground and give off more energy than electricity (something that environmentalist Ed Begley might be proud of).

"Santa With Muscles" is hardly great cinema nor is it as heartwarming a Yuletide tale as "A Christmas Story." Hulk Hogan looks wild-eyed and incredulous and he isn't much of an actor but he sells the role with his physique and double takes. I do wonder why the orphans (including a very young Mila Kunis) fix his Santa suit with black gloves and a studded belt that seems to have been stolen from Chrissie Hynde of The Pretenders, or how the proprietors of the orphanage never even knew there was a cavern with a bolted door? Or why the funniest bit that ex-SNL star Garrett Morris is given to do is to be nearly run over by an ice cream truck? Or why California cops are armed with bazookas? Still, 1996 saw this movie come and go without much notice (I never heard of it until recently). It is more fun and spirited than 1996's dull AhNuld X-Mas film, "Jingle all the Way."