This sow is mine!

THE EXORCIST (1973):  FORTIETH ANNIVERSARY - A look back at the scariest supernatural horror film ever made!
By Jerry Saravia
Yes, this psychological, shock horror classic did not end up on the AFI list of 100 Greatest American movies a decade ago - instead, the best they could come up with was the original 1931 classic "Frankenstein," ignoring the superior "Bride of Frankenstein." Despite the lack of status on the AFI, there are several good reasons to celebrate "The Exorcist" (restored in 2000 as a longer cut thanks to Friedkin and Blatty). "The Exorcist" is, gasp, a thinking man's horror film - a deeply spiritual film about faith. It is also the only horror film of this century to have convinced an exclusive number of people that the Devil exists. "She doesn't say she's a demon. She says she is the Devil himself. Now if you know as many psychotics as I do, you know it is the same thing as saying you are Napoleon Bonaparte," as Father Karras (Jason Miller) declares of his confrontation with Regan (played, of course, by Linda Blair) to Chris MacNeil. Now more popular than ever thanks to its re-release in theatres in 2000, "The Exorcist" is a reminder of what horror was and what horror should be - a terrifying look at the human condition and what faith is today in our modern world when confronted with evil. 

"The Exorcist" is not what you expect each time you see it. It's not that I find multiple meanings in this film with each viewing or that I am astounded by some of the surprises in it, but I am always riveted by the experience. One notable example: I am more surprised by the exorcism sequence in particular - they have the power to frighten each time I see them. The levitating bed, the subliminal fast cuts of a demon in white face, the way that Jason Miller and Max von Sydow circle Regan's bedroom while she spews obscenities galore and vomits and rotates her bed 180 degrees, not to mention the tantalizing shot of Regan sitting up on her bed and reaching for the superimposed shot of the demon statue of Pazuzu, etc. There is genuine tension and terrific horror imagery throughout this amazing sequence. 

The performances still rank among the best in contemporary horror. Ellen Burstyn's fits of rage as Chris MacNeil and Regan's physical and psychological abuse towards her have become the actress's trademark ever since. What is more impressive are Burstyn's quiet scenes, particularly with a youthful, pretty Linda Blair, and I like how they cavort in the bedroom about the men in Chris's life, or when they play in the basement with the Ouija board. I think Linda Blair is quite underrated in this movie (despite her controversial Best Supporting Actress nomination): she undergoes a thrilling, painful transformation from pubescent little girl with rosy cheeks to a raging, raving maniac with green eyes and a disgustingly long tongue - interestingly, she is not that different from the way Burstyn acts in her manic episodes. What helps Blair's performance is naturally Mercedes McCambridge's gargling, deep, multilayered voice, but Blair's facial expressions that run the gamut from happy, innocent and confused to angry, pathetic and fearsome is clearly a bona fide work of acting. Kudos must also go to the late Lee J. Cobb as the private detective, Lt. Kinderman, who has seen everything (and is a film buff) but nothing like the desecration at the church or the bizarre killing in front of the Exorcist steps (an ominous image in itself). And it is always a profound pleasure to see Max von Sydow, treading on Ingmar Bergman's religious God-fearing waters, in his role of the sickly 70-year-old Father Merrin who's performed exorcisms before. 

A final note is the hard-edged performance by Jason Miller as Karras, the psychiatric Jesuit priest who questions his own faith (or lack of it) and feels responsible for the death of his own mother (this was Miller's debut on screen and thus received his first and only Oscar nomination for Best Supporting Actor). Karras is a torn man with doubts that are wiped away once he confronts the Devil. The scene where he visits Regan and records her growling voice while speaking to each other in Latin is probably the only humorously eerie scene in the entire movie. 

"The Exorcist" would not have endured for this long had it not been for William Friedkin's realistic direction and his acute sense of time and place. The cinematography by Owen Roizman is superbly realized, employing effective use of both the light and the dark. The best examples are the opening Iraq sequence (shot by Billy Williams), taking place in mostly sunlit digging areas, and the justifiably famous shot of a silhouetted Father Merrin standing outside of Regan's bedroom where a shaft of light and fog illuminates the scene. And you can savor the documentary-like scenes where Regan undergoes a spinal tap and several excruciating medical tests from doctors. Some people find these passages are as freaky and disturbing as anything else that happens afterward. 

The documentary, known as "The Fear of God" (initially made available on the 25th Anniversary video/DVD edition of "The Exorcist": the DVD version has the complete 75-minute version). It is an enlightening, informative documentary hosted by Mark Kermode, and it focuses on the various accidents, deaths and mysteries surrounding the making of the film. Most revealing are William Friedkin's tactics in getting his actors to react honestly or emote properly by firing a gun into the air - a tactic shared by Roman Polanski. I also liked some of the scenes cut from the original version, including the infamous "Spider-Walk" where Regan walks on all fours and wiggles her tongue like a serpent at the nanny's legs after Chris learns of Burke Dennings's death. There is also a final scene between Father Dyer (Reverend William O'Malley) and Kinderman after Chris and Regan leave from the dreaded Georgetown house. It may be easy for people to laugh at "The Exorcist" now since there have been several unwarranted rip-offs (excepting "The Omen"), sequels and parodies. Still, the film continues to be compelling, powerful, scary, haunting and shocking (the masturbation with the crucifix is still tough to watch). The difference between "The Exorcist" and most horror films of late is that the former takes itself seriously, and that is part of its emotional power. It's the seminal, supernatural horror film of the century, unsurpassed in its ugly vision of the genuine force of evil in today's world. 


EXORCIST FACTS AND TRIVIA There are so many subtleties and clues in "The Exorcist" that they are easy to miss and/or dismiss. I am surprised at the number of "E" sites I've looked at that have not picked up on the importance of such minute details. Although the film may not have the understatement of Rosemary's Baby, it still manages to be just as implicit in its mysteries about faith and belief in the forces of good and evil. Firstly, let's correct some misconceptions and unsubstantial rumors regarding specific shots in the film: 

The Projectile-Vomit scene It has been assumed that an actress (Eileen Dietz) was used as Linda's double for the vomiting scene, and that is only partially true. Just after Father Karras (Jason Miller) asks Regan about his mother's name, a stream of green vomit splashes on his face (originally it was to have hit his jacket only but it missed). The very first shot of Regan is a medium shot of her strapped to her bed, and it is clearly Linda Blair vomiting (look at it in slow-motion if you don't believe me). The next shot is of Karras being hit, and following that shot we see a shadowy, darkly lit shot of Eileen spewing what's left out of her mouth. How repulsive! The White-Faced Demon: Pazuzu There are three half-second shots of a demon in white face in "The Exorcist." These shots are called subliminal cuts - one of the greatest, most powerful tools of cinematic expression since Eisenstein's montage editing system. The first subliminal shot occurs during Karras's dream where he sees his mother crying by a subway station. He runs towards her. We see quick shots of his mother in a dark room, a grandfather clock, and a cross or necklace of some kind falling in slow-motion (later identified as the St. Joseph's medal). In between these shots, we see a single-frame shot of a white-faced demon with red eyes staring down at the screen looking frighteningly gaunt and skeletal-like. The next two shots of the demon are during the exorcism sequence: there is another single-frame shot while Regan is writhing in bed and the lights are flashing on and off. The last shot of the demon is in a famous, intensely ugly close-up of Regan staring right at Karras. We see Regan's face and a superimposition of the demon's right eye and part of its mouth.

There has been some talk about who actually plays the white-faced demon. The Internet Movie Database and Mark Kermode's invaluable book on the film mention Eileen Dietz as the demon. Some have actually suggested that Jason Miller plays the demon and, although it is an unfounded rumor, it does draw an interesting parallel. One can infer that if the demon is Karras's death mask, it would inevitably lead to his final jump to the death at the bottom of the Exorcist stairs. Nevertheless, according to Kermode's book, director William Friedkin said that make-up effects of the demon were tested...and he decided it was best to use flashes (subliminal cuts) of the demon since they would not work as separate whole scenes for the film during the exorcism. Although this throws my Karras theory out the window, I still think it is a good one.  
Strange, bizarre moments (and some strangely beautiful ones, too) in THE EXORCIST There are moments in "The Exorcist" that are so strange and mystical, both aurally and visually, that it is indeed one of the most aesthetically beautiful films ever made. The one famous image, used in the advertising of the film, is of a silhouetted Father Merrin standing by the MacNeil house where a shaft of light bursts through Regan's window. Below are other fascinating examples of image and sound: 

1.) The slingshot sound effect is first heard when Chris MacNeil walks up to the attic thinking there are rats in there. The second time she hears them, she enters the attic only to discover that her servant Karl is there and tells her, "See. No rats." The next time we hear the slingshot sound effect is just after Chris's meeting with Lt. Kinderman. She hears the sound followed by Regan's cries for help with the demon yelling at her: You bitch! As Chris races to help Regan, she's horrified to find Regan masturbating with a bloody crucifix. As Chris tries to snatch the crucifix, she is hit in the face and falls on the floor. When Chris looks back, she sees Regan rotating her head and screaming at her with a British accent that mimics Burke Dennings, Chris's director: Do you know what she did? Your c*&*%#@ daughter!"

This scene is significant on many levels: it cleverly builds the horror subliminally from the onset, and serves as a turning point n Chris's character. She first discovers that Regan is exhibiting a split personality, though no brain lesions are to be found. Then she gets more bad news that her director and close friend Burke is dead (originally followed by the Spider-Walk scene), followed by finding her daughter masturbating and bringing up the memory of Burke, resulting in her desperate consultation with Karras to perform an exorcism. 

2.) Kinderman discovers a piece of clay at the bottom of the long Exorcist steps. This piece of clay seems to come from Regan since he later discovers other pieces of clay in Chris's house. The manner in which the Lieutenant brushes the dirt off of the clay piece is similar to Merrin's discovery of a sculptured head piece of Pazuzu covered in dirt.

3.) Father Damien Karras, one of the most important characters in "The Exorcist", undergoes quite a few changes in the film. At the beginning of the film, he seems to be a man losing his faith in God and in his own life, particularly with the declining health of his mother. When he first confronts Regan, she says to him offscreen, "Can you help an old altar boy, faddah?". Karras recollects that this was the same voice of a homeless person he ignored in the subway when he went to visit his mother. Regan also verbally attacks Karras about his mother's death on many occasions. She tells him that his mother's soul is within her, and thus pretends to be his mother by mimicking her Greek accent. At one point during the exorcism, Regan yells to Karras: "You killed your mother! You left her alone to die! She'll never forgive you, you bastard!" All of these moments serve to underlie Karras's lack of faith in himself and in others, especially when dealing with his inability to help the mentally ill or the homeless. When he tells Tom, another priest, that he's losing his faith, there's a quick transitional cut to the MacNeil house where the wind blows the leaves off the ground.

4.) When Chris tearfully tells Karras that her daughter is possessed and needs an exorcist, we hear young girls and boys playing in a nearby playground. This is an indication that Chris wants things to go back to normal - after all the youthful, sweetly innocent Regan should be out there playing with the kids as well.

5.) Ellen Burstyn undergoes several emotionally traumatic moments as the tormented Chris - it must have been pure hell to be in such an emotional state for nine months of production. My favorite moment is one that is easy to miss: when Kinderman visits the house, Chris asks him if he would like some more coffee. As she approaches the kitchen, she tries to maintain her composure while the lieutenant peruses Regan's clay objects and her painted pictures. Another moment is her horrified look when Regan yells and makes obscene gestures at the doctors.

6.) Regan's demonic giggle when Karras tries to bring back Father Merrin is heard briefly on the soundtrack of "The Exorcist III" when Kinderman is at a church and hears the wind blowing.

7.) St. Joseph's medal is the medal first seen in Iraq where Merrin peers over it and says, "This is strange." Later it is seen in Karras's dream. Then it is found around Karras's neck while attempting to force the demonic spirit out of Regan. Regan manages to remove it from his neck. By the end of the film, it is found in Sharon, the nanny's hands (played by Kitty Winn), where she gives it to Chris who then hands it back to Father Dyer as if in remembrance of Father Karras. If you have seen the new version, Dyer hands it back to her. Exactly what the significance of the medal is remains a mystery - it is a detail not to be found in the book. As Friedkin mentioned in his commentary on the film, it is a cinematic device, a sort of magic talisman and finally the thread between the Iraq scenes and the Georgetown scenes. 

Me and Linda Blair at Chiller Theatre, circa 1999 or 2000.

Note: two of my favorite actors of all time are mentioned below, the most recent deaths of people involved with "The Exorcist."

IN MEMORIAM: JASON MILLER 1939-2001 - the one and only Father Karras passed away May 16th of a heart attack. He is best known for writing the play THAT CHAMPIONSHIP SEASON. He will be missed.
IN MEMORIAM: MERCEDES MCCAMBRIDGE 1918-2004 - a stupendous actress who supplied the gargling, multilayered voices of the demon in THE EXORCIST died on March 2, 2004 of natural causes. Won a Best Supporting Actress Oscar for ALL THE KING'S MEN (1949)

Fists of Humiliation

FIST OF UNICORN aka Bruce Lee and I (1972)

Reviewed by Jerry Saravia

So the palms of Unicorn Chan are so powerful that once they make an impact on someone's chest, they kill the person. Not before Unicorn Chan starts thinking of his powerful palms does an image of Bruce Lee suddenly show up on screen as a double-exposure. And we get many scenes where Unicorn uses his arms more than his legs in a fight and then, as if Bruce Lee is suddenly speaking to him, the palms work their magic and kill the opponent.

Unicorn Chan is not much of an actor but he has the ability and grace of a natural fighter. His presence is not commanding, despite numerous close-ups. He plays some sort of bum who parades from one town to another and sleeps under bridges. Some kid notices him showing off his flips and jumps. Chan is welcome by the kid and his mother. There is trouble in the nearby town where the local hoodlums kill people left and right, and Japanese women are used as whores though some of them are actually Chinese pretending to be Japanese! Unicorn is humiliated by these men at one point when he is forced to crawl between one man's legs! Imagine Bruce Lee being humiliated like that! Then the kid cries and calls Unicorn a coward, and then he apologizes. We are also treated to two men who stutter throughout the film, and even try to one-up each other in a stuttering contest.

"Fist of Unicorn's" action scenes were choreographed by Bruce Lee as a favor to Unicorn Chan who helped Lee get his kung-fu feet planted in Hong Kong cinema. Lee might have taught Unicorn how to act as well. By the way, Lee can be glimpsed in the opening scenes showing off his prowess to Unicorn, though a double is obviously used! That means Lee had no intention to act in a scene with his own friend! Sacrilege! As for Unicorn Chan, little is known about him. This was his only leading role and it did nothing for his career. He appeared in some of Bruce Lee's films and did a brief cameo in "Bruce Lee: The Man, The Myth." Anyone that makes a film as abysmal as "Fist of Unicorn" might consider never making a film again. Who wants to be consistently humiliated?

Bruce Lee's comical buffoonery

RETURN OF THE DRAGON aka WAY OF THE DRAGON (1972)

Reviewed by Jerry Saravia

I am a huge Bruce Lee fan. I always thought, and still do, that Bruce Lee was the greatest martial-arts fighter who ever graced the silver screen. "Return of the Dragon" was Lee's writing and directorial debut, as well as being the chief fight choreographer, and after the amazingly intense "The Chinese Connection," it seemed he could do no wrong. Well, Bruce Lee was an amazing fighter but not the most astute writer or director in the world.

Lee plays a country bumpkin named Tang Lung, whose services in the martial-arts are required in Rome. You see, Lung's relatives own a Chinese restaurant and the Mafia wants to control it. The owners refuse and so the chief Mafia goon's minions try to irritate them and beat them to a pulp. Not if Lung can help it, though the relatives are not so sure. But this is a Bruce Lee movie and you know Lee will get to fight at some point.

The action scenes are electric and tantalizing. Particularly memorable is Lee's handling of two nunchakus at once or his fight with an American martial-artist (Chuck Norris) at the Roman Coliseum. The fight scenes in general are so damn good that you wish it was in the service of a better story. There is a cruel twist in the final reel but not much else that is story driven. The Mafioso goons are hardly much of a threat. When the story doesn't work and there's no action, we get discussions on Japanese karate vs. Chinese karate, and some unfunny attempts at humor (though I like the goon that tries to use a nunchaku). As an example in displaying the comical buffoonery of a country bumpkin, Lee does a Three Stooges routine that will make you squirm and cringe.

"Return of the Dragon" (alternate title outside the U.S. was "The Way of the Dragon") was dubbed for American release, and it boasts the worst dubbing I've ever seen in any foreign film, martial-arts or otherwise. Not only do the words not match the lips (consistently true of most kung-fu epics), there is also a laughable moment where an English phrase is translated in...English! The title of the film, "Return of the Dragon," falsely advertised that Lee's heroic, James Bond-like character from "Enter the Dragon" was back ("Return" was released in the U.S. in 1974, one year after Lee's death and the release of "Enter the Dragon"). The only similarity between the two characters is their fighting style. Also worth noting is that most of the relatives of Lee's character were actual relatives of Lee, including Nora Miao, the girl with no fighting skills (if there was ever the waste of a decent actress, this is it) and Unicorn Chan.

"Return of the Dragon" boasts some effective, realistic fight footage and Lee has a catlike, phenomenally physical presence - you can't take your eyes off him. The fight scenes are legendary and definitely worth seeing for them alone. The movie is laughable and silly but definitely no time-waster.

Batturd, Robinflakey and Batbitch are all clueless

Check out my codpiece, or how I wish Chris Nolan went back in time and warned me not don the BatNipple
BATMAN AND ROBIN (1997)
Reviewed by Jerry Saravia
(Originally written and published in 1998)

 The "Batman" movie series has approached the mentality of the campy Adam West TV series of yesteryear: dumb, parodic and juvenile. "Batman and Robin" is a bad film; wholly uneven and one-dimensional unlike the previous "Batman" films that relied so much on character. This one has so many fight scenes and Dolby-ized explosions and car wrecks that, at first, I thought I was watching an overblown action flick a'la Stallone.

The miscast George Clooney (TV's "E.R.") stars as the lighthearted, rather than brooding, Batman who is more concerned with bedroom theatrics and the look of his belt buckle and body armor than with catching the bad guys. Chris O'Donnell reprises his role as "Bird Boy," excuse me, Robin, the bird-brained Bat partner who is always horny. Poor Michael Gough returns as the dutiful servant of Wayne Manor, Alfred, who is getting quite ill (after seeing the script, no doubt) Then there's Alicia Silverstone (also miscast) as a schoolgirl who is Alfred's niece and loves to ride around in motorbikes because of the danger principle (?) Or is it the Danger Zone? She eventually dons a Bat suit and presto (!), she's Batgirl. Red alert to all screenwriters: where's the transition? Somehow, the idea that Alfred prepared a Bat suit for her because he was expecting her to enter the Batcave is hardly credible.

Is there a story or a worthy plot in this movie? Answer: neither. There's a plot thread which is left dangling longer than Batman does from the ceiling. Arnold Schwarzenegger is Mr. Freeze, a Terminator-like villain who shoots every innocent bystander with a freezing beam that turns them into ice sculptures. Why is he doing this? Because he wants to save his cryogenically preserved wife by finding a cure to a disease which the dying Alfred also suffers from. Got it? And the villainess is Poison Ivy (Uma Thurman), a sexy "Plant Girl" who has venomous lips and chlorophyll for blood. "Don't kiss her!" utters Batman at one point before Robin is lured into lip lock status. Poison Ivy wants Mother Nature to begin plant life all over again and thus becomes partners with Mr. Freeze who is ready to freeze Gotham City. Will Batman, Robin and Batgirl stop them in time? Does anybody care anymore?

Joel Schumacher ("Batman Forever") helmed this travesty as well and it is a considerable waste of celluloid. He shoots all the fight scenes in extremely tight close-ups so it is hard to decipher what is happening sometimes. Some action scenes do work, particularly the dazzling opening sequence, but how many tight butt shots and shots below-the-belt can you stand? Holy sexual innuendos!

The characters are amazingly all underdeveloped. The duality of Batman and Bruce Wayne is hardly represented anymore, and the script's idea of Bruce is to have Clooney walk around in a black robe and smile incongruently. After a while, I started to think that Batman and Bruce Wayne were not the same person! Chris O'Donnell tries to act tough but appears more as a jealous, sexually frustrated kid than a hero. Ditto Alicia Silverstone who is as clueless as everyone else. Schwarzenegger seems to be having a good time but his one-liners ("The Iceman Cometh. Hell will freeze over. Just chill") get to be repetitive after a while and do nothing to enhance the character - he's just a blue-eyed hulk. Uma Thurman is marvelous in perhaps the best performance in the movie but her Poison Ivy shtick (blowing kisses of purplish smoke) is thinly executed and done with none of the relish that Michelle Pfeiffer had with Catwoman. And pity Michael Gough who I hope will outlive this pointless franchise. And there is the villain Bane, who is simply another musclebound hulk.

I am a fan of the Batman series but this one is tired, unimaginative and soulless. There's no excitement or spontaneity in the dusty Batcave anymore. The music is loud enough to keep you awake, the explosions are delivered on cue, and there's enough TV-style humor to make Adam West want to don his suit again, but there's no sense of who Batman and Robin are or why they should be considered heroes. As usual, the threadbare villains steal the show. One more movie like this and the villains will become the heroes to root for. Maybe that's not such a bad idea.

What if the South won and Lincoln lived to be an old man?

C.S.A: Confederate States of America (2004)

Reviewed by Jerry Saravia

Alternately hilarious and frightening, "C.S.A: Confederate States of America" is an alternate account, in the guise of a mockumentary, of Civil War History. It posits a fascinating question: what if the Confederates won the Civil War instead of the Northerners? The scenario is troubling, the answer many will find controversial.

In this alternate account, President Abraham Lincoln is not assassinated in the Ford Theater - he hides from the Confederates by wearing blackface and stays with Harriet Tubman. He lives to be an old man, a forgotten footnote in history who lives his last days in Canada in infamy after having been jailed. Confederate Jefferson Davis becomes President, the United States become the Confederate States, slaves are considered the white man's property forever, and Mark Twain and others move to Canada where an abolitionist group is formed. Oh, that is not all. Hitler is our friend in CSA, a chancellor to Germany who is recruited for talks on how to handle the Jews - use them as slave labor instead of exterminating them! (It is never clear if Hitler went ahead with his own holocaust or not.) The CSA goes to war with Canada over their anti-slavery, abolitionist stance. To make matters worse, the film we are watching is actually a PBS-type of documentary with modern-day commercial breaks featuring the worst commercial products ever that carry negative images of blacks (many of these products did exist at one time, the names of which I will not repeat here).

"C.S.A" covers a lot of ground, from popular culture perpetuating the minstrel stereotypes all through the 2000 decade, to the reasons why the Civil War was fought (slavery, primarily, a bone of contention for many historians, and secession from the Union), to products that reinforce the slave mentality (the film ends with a description of various products that did exist and some, Uncle Ben and Aunt Jemima, that continue the trend, to the existence of mulattos (a big no-no), to propaganda film such as the brilliant fake "I Married an Abolitionist" and the D.W. Griffith fake film featuring a blackface Lincoln, to a mocking of the TV show "COPS" called "Runaway," to a 2000 political candidate with lineage dating to the Civil War who might be a mulatto. Interspersed throughout is actual film footage and photos of a time most would probably like to forget (including that 1863 photo taken by abolitionists of a black man's heavily whip-scarred back, or one heinous photo of a hanging), all meant to shock and provoke from a history that has been rewritten or glorified or romanticized.

Written and directed by film professor Kevin Willmott, "C.S.A." is pure satire and either you will laugh or cringe or both. It is most certainly thought-provoking and disturbing in that modern-day society is not far off from what is shown in this alternate universe. The film was released in 2004 but, in 2012, we are still too far from an America where blacks are not discriminated (or almost segregated, notably schools thanks to the Koch brothers, an act that almost became a reality). Discrimination and institutional racism are more subtle nowadays, but it still happens. So when politicians from the right discuss how things have changed, and that they wish to espouse the values and virtues of the past (as shown clearly in this film), you have to wonder what past they are talking about.  

A Joe Pesci gem of a Ruby

DEAR MR. WONDERFUL (1982)

Reviewed by Jerry Saravia

 I stated once before that one of my favorite hobbies is finding an obscure film on TV or at a video store. As I sifted through endless DVD's and VHS's at the local Princeton Record Exchange store (check it out sometime if you are ever in Princeton, NJ), I came across a DVD of a film I've heard of. It's called "Dear Mr. Wonderful," an occasionally diverting, slow-paced and distressing film. It was released back in 1982 to little or no fanfare, but it does sport an effective Joe Pesci performance, his first lead role after the breakthrough of "Raging Bull."

A mustachioed Pesci plays a Jewish singer named Ruby Dennis. He lives with his sister (Karen Ludwig), a factory worker, and her son, Raymond (Evan Handler), in a crowded apartment in Jersey City, NJ. Ruby owns a bowling alley that serves as a lounge for singers. It seems Ruby does all the singing while the crashing of bowling balls drowns out all the music. His dream is to go to Vegas, but his sister feels he is only fooling himself (though she does offer him money stashed in tin bowls in the freezer!) It turns out that the mob wants to take the alley out of the neighborhood, thinking (correctly) that Ruby is an embarrassment and too much of an expense when they could have a real nightclub. Ruby will not budge yet money is tight. It is so tight in fact that his nephew, Raymond, starts swiping gold necklaces from women in the street!

In some ways, "Dear Mr. Wonderful" has the flavor and realistic feel of a Martin Scorsese picture, and that can be attributed to the realistic performances and some eyeful NY shots. In the acting range, Pesci has quite a few good scenes as Ruby, playing him as a man who doesn't realize he is stuck in a hole. Perhaps he is not such a great singer either (Joe Pesci also wrote his own songs for the film) - part of his act is to smoke a cigarette and hold a drink, though it may take more than that to appeal to renown singer Tony Martin, who shows up in a curious cameo. The film is also an attempt at showing the working habits of the Jewish working class, though it is less successful than tapping into Ruby's own failed dreams. In the lounge scenes, he seems to be as pathetic and lonely as Jake La Motta's nightclub acts in "Raging Bull."

As directed by German director Peter Lilienthal, "Dear Mr. Wonderful" has its lulls (including a tepid romance between Ruby and a 21-year-old singer) but what it does right is convey Ruby's own ambitions and tired musical act. Barring sentiment and any Capraesque moments, we see Ruby as a fleshed-out human being on a road of self-destruction. The fact that he realizes his own shortcomings without admitting to them is the film's major strength. "Dear Mr. Wonderful" (also known as "Ruby's Dream") may not be your cup of tea but it is worth seeking out.

Bad Transgressive Trash

GEEK MAGGOT BINGO (1983) - A.K.A. The Freak From Suckweasel Mountain 

Reviewed by Jerry Saravia 

Okay, this is one of those curios that you may or may not have heard of before. I am in the minority. A friend of mine lent me his copy from a video store called "Twonky's" in New Jersey, Somerset County to be precise. He called this "bad art" yet worthwile if you love art, period. Whatever the heck that means. Oh, yes, the ludicrous production design reminded him of "Cabinet of Dr. Caligari." I didn't know whether to laugh or cringe.

"Geek Maggot Bingo" is so rotten and devoid of anything remotely artistic or fun, even on a "movie-movie" level, that you'll wish I never even bothered writing this review to begin with. There's TV horror host John Zacherle hosting this film, badly, and nodding off while watching it, as was I. There are cardboard sets that look like they have been designed in the basement that would make the late Ed Wood turn in his grave at the sight of them. A terrible monster creation that makes "Robot Monster" look like the most inventively designed creature in ages. A vampire queen named Scumbalina that makes me wish Vampira did come back and host horror-thons again - she should have sued this actress for doing such a horrible imitation! Dozens of laughless one-liners and in-jokes starting with Mr. Frankenberry (Ha!) and his assistant, Gicko, pronounced Gekko! A cowboy crooner who is almost used for experiments by the good Doctor. Two bimbos on hand for sexual dallying, although I may have miscounted by one. Are you still reading this?

The production is so badly patched-together and edited that I wouldn't call it anything less than grade F gutter 

trash. Nick Zedd, the thoughtless don of "The Cinema of Transgression," directed this, yet even 

Allan Smithee could have done a more efficient job. Come to think of it, Smithee would've been 
too proud to let his pseudonym be used on this junk. Bad art? No! Call it bad trash. 

NOTE: For truly good bad movies of another kind, check out the hilarious Ed Wood classics (especially "Glen or Glenda!"), or the cult classic "Reefer Madness." Not only will you have a better time, you'll find they are about something, too.