Soporific peyote trance

RENEGADE aka BLUEBERRY (2004)

Reviewed by Jerry Saravia

The idea of a psychedelic Western is nothing new, especially when one thinks of Robert Altman's dreamlike Western filled with opium smoke, "McCabe and Mrs. Miller." Then there is "Blueberry," a music-video montage of endless, pointless, cumbersome images that add up to nothing. The effort is admirable, the execution deplorable.

Vincent Cassel is Blueberry, a Man With No Attitude, who is marshal of a small town. Before becoming marshal, he was a young kid who witnessed the death of a prostitute who deflowered him. Eventually, his own uncle is killed, and he finds himself being nurtured by Chiracahua natives who call him Broken Nose. Years later, Blueberry is in a town where there are the requisite bevy of prostitutes, amoral gunslingers, and not much else. Juliette Lewis is the spunky, Annie Oakley-type who sings "Danny Boy." Geoffrey Lewis (Juliette's real-life father) also plays her father in this film. There is also Colm Meaney as Blueberry's friend, Michael Madsen as the amoral villain who's searching for Indian gold, Eddie Izzard as a Prussian mercenary who may be trying for Marlon Brando's "Missouri Breaks"-type of colorful acting, and the welcome addition of Ernest Borgnine.

The movie is a mess, a beautiful mess to be sure. Vincent Cassel is a less than charismatic, blank presence - registering nothing at all that seems vaguely human (what a disappointment when you consider his hellishly alive performance in "Hate"). The cinematography is gorgeous to be sure with its widescreen vistas, but then so were John Ford's and Sergio Leone's westerns and they had more to say than this film. The peyote, drug-fueled imagery towards the end goes on way past the level of patience. Since we know next to nothing about the boring protagonist, why should we care about his peyote trances?

Based on Jean 'Moebius' Giraud's comic books, "Blueberry" is a pretty disaster that follows on the heels of superior films such as "El Topo" and "Dead Man." To paraphrase Orson Welles's own paraphrasing of Kipling, "It is pretty, but is it art?"

Tired Cool Factor

THE WAY OF THE GUN (2000)

Reviewed by Jerry Saravia

Christopher McQuarrie's "The Way of the Gun" is a noirish crime story without the post-modern irony of Quentin Tarantino. Although this may be a refreshing conceit, the film is nothing more than disposable, mean-spirited, one-dimensional hogwash with no redeeming qualities whatsoever.

The convoluted story deals with two amoral sociopaths, Mr. Parker (Ryan Phillippe) and Longbaugh (Benicio Del Toro), who will either resort to petty crimes or minimum wage jobs. Thoroughly unsure of themselves, they head to a sperm bank where they overhear about a pregnant woman, Robin (Juliette Lewis), who has agreed to a $1 million fee to carry the baby of a wealthy oil tycoon and his desperate, gold-digging wife. The terminally stupid sociopaths decide there is a bargain here if they kidnap the pregnant woman for a fifteen million dollar ransom. Problem is they are new at this kind of crime, and have no notion on what to do next (heck, Robin is quicker at defending herself with a shotgun than they are).

Naturally, a cleaner or "adjudicator" (essentially a smooth hitman played by James Caan) pursues the trio, along with two bodyguards (the appealing coolness of Taye Diggs and the tactful Nicky Katt, who played a grimier, similar role in "The Limey"). This leads them to the seediest kind of motel just south of the Mexican border where Parker and Longbaugh are holding Robin hostage. And, to remind some of good old Sam Peckinpah, there is an overlong, tedious shootout involving the antiheroes and bag men, culminating in an empty fountain with broken shards of glass.

The film starts well enough, particularly the kidnapping scene amidst gunfire where Robin makes the mistake of not following the bodyguards' orders. Unfortunately, as written and directed by McQuarrie (who wrote the superior "The Usual Suspects"), there is scant character development and the personalities of the sociopaths are nonexistent - they are merely cartoonish types used as props to advance the plot. There isn't a single character the audience could possibly identify with except for Juliette Lewis's humane Robin, faced with carrying a baby while evading bullets, and screaming and hollering with pain through the whole movie while in labor. Lewis makes her character sympathetic but since she is not the main focus of the film; we are left with far too many ugly, emotionally corrupted people taking center stage. Boy, do I miss Kevin Spacey's Verbal Quint from "Usual Suspects."

James Caan adds a touch of vulnerability to the proceedings and has some clever lines (Examples: "$15 million is not money. It's a motive with a universal adaptor on it. Let's just say I deal in the fine art of adjudication.") He also has a touching scene with Geoffrey Lewis, a suicidal drinking buddy. In fact, it was nice to see Geoffrey Lewis share one scene with his real-life daughter Juliette, though I would have hoped for more than seeing them in another typical shootout. As for the leading troublemakers, Phillippe hardly has much going for him except for a noticeable accent, and Del Toro seems to be in a leftover drug-stoked haze from "Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas." You want to see these two murderers rubbed out within the first half-hour, and that does not say much for McQuarrie. He makes the mistake of not instilling any humanity in these characters, so if he doesn't care, why should we?

Conflicted and burdened by repetitive shootouts and silly twists and turns, "The Way of the Gun" is an empty void with an ugly, interminable streak of meanness. Film noir at its most fatalistic tells us there is no escape from the world. Fortunately, you have the option of escaping from this travesty by way of the theater exits.

Xena: Warrior Princess The Movie! Or not?

DESATURATING OUR COMIC-BOOK HEROES

By Jerry Saravia

At the 2014 Comic-Con in San Diego, a new Wonder Woman still was revealed to eager comic-book fans. Who didn't love Wonder Woman from the comics and the Lynda Carter TV series of the 70's - the warrior princess with the red top, golden Lasso of Truth, the blue star-spangled shorts or culottes to some (used to be a long skirt in the "Sensation Comics"), the bright red boots, her tiara, her bulletproof bracelets, ready for action. Below are the original appearances of Wonder Woman, from her inception in the 1940's and the slight changes in appearance through the 1970's via the television medium.

At Comic-Con, the new cinematic Wonder Woman was unveiled and looked like this:

Granted, starting in 2011, desaturation of the Wonder Woman costume in a post-Christopher Nolan world of troubled superheroes began to take shape. Witness the Justice League comics from 2011 with the revamped look for Wonder Woman:

So why does the new Wonder Woman of the "Batman vs. Superman: Dawn of Justice" film look like a warrior princess of the J.R.R. Tolkien world or a Xena wannabe than the American icon of primary colors of the past? We can ask the same question of the CW series of "Arrow" based on Green Arrow, accent on the green which is relatively muted in the new show, or the virtually burgundy red costumed look of the new CW "Flash" TV series? The old Flash from the comics, even the 1990's TV series, had the fiery red color of the very fast hero.

But what is going on lately with our comic-book heroes? Why desaturate the colors? I think the reason may be an international economic agenda. Most of these expensive epics, including "Iron Man 3," are released overseas first, specifically China where a lot of the money is made (witness "Transformers: Age of Extinction" which passed the worldwide 1 billion mark thanks to China's box-office grosses). Case in point with "Iron Man 3" - Tony Stark barely wears his red-gold plated armor costume through most of the film (although there is the Iron Patriot played by Don Cheadle). Marvel doesn't seem to extremely modify their heroes' costumes, except for the new Spider-Man, and the Avengers do stand pretty close to their original incarnations (Mark Ruffalo's super-sized Hulk is as green as the Hulk can be). The DC universe has taken the desaturation to its limits, however. Perhaps by muting the colors that so resemble our American flag and thus represent America (Wonder Woman, Superman, etc), it is an easier sell to foreign markets who are not keen on America and its standing in our world nowadays - in other words, nothing too American. Another odd circumstance regarding a high-profile franchise with a hero, Indiana Jones, was in the first teasers released for "Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull." The International teaser did not feature the American flag as seen during the convoy of Army trucks at Area 51 - in the U.S. version, a close-up of the flag during the same shot is present.

The notion is practically more economic than political...and perhaps the Man of Steel costume may reflect a post-9/11 America or maybe the costume designers forgot that the look was reminiscent of Bizarro or the evil Supes from "Superman III." We can make all the excuses we want and justify such glaringly wrongheaded revisionism in general - I say, forget what the world thinks of us, and bring back our primary colors. I mean, who wants a desaturated "Dick Tracy" movie unlike the primary colors so evident in Warren Beatty's 1990 version? 

Lloyd Dobler would not watch this movie

MUST LOVE DOGS (2005)

Reviewed by Jerry Saravia

Now here is something that could have had potential. Diane Lane and John Cusack in a romantic comedy set in the world of Internet dating. Yes, potential indeed and, sadly, potential does exist, just not in this movie. "Must Love Dogs" is a forgettable sham, a black hole of a movie that perpetrates the belief that love blossoms between the right people, even if they are wrong for each other. Actually, it seems to indicate that the slightest flaw in the opposite sex is enough reason to dismiss that person.

Diane Lane is the lonely bird, Sarah Nolan, who has just been through a bitter divorce. She is a preschool teacher who lives alone in a big, expansive house and unsuccessfully searches for men at the local supermarket. Sarah's sister (Elizabeth Perkins) insists she go online and place an ad, though her sister has already done it and posted Sarah's graduation photo. Sarah meets a few men, including the typical crybaby date, and all prove fruitless. That is until she meets Jake (John Cusack), who builds racing boats out of wood and continually watches "Dr. Zhivago." They both have dogs, though they do not own them personally. The date doesn't go well, and Sarah has her eye on a guy with a PHD (Dermot Mulroney). By the way, Sarah thinks he has a good butt - I don't and could care less. I think we all know where this is headed.

The best thing in this movie is Diane Lane, a helluva good actress who can do better (consider "A Walk on the Moon," which was a far more poignant and romantic film). She is too good for this movie and supplies it with certain nuances that are not in the script. She has a few standout scenes, especially when trying to look alluring at a supermarket - the key is in which department. But her Sarah character is not developed - what kind of guy is she looking for? It is clear that she has no tolerance for 40-something guys who bed 20-something women (it is what caused her divorce). By the end of the film, you'll wonder if knowing that you love the same movie is all it takes to marry Sarah.

John Cusack is also too good for this movie, or even in fluffier fluff like "Serendipity." Cusack possesses a charm that comes from his own unawareness that he is charming. The beauty of Cusack in films like "High Fidelity" or "Say Anything" is that he is humble and uncertain - that is his gift, his special knack for playing men who are not too comfortable in their own skins. In "Must Love Dogs," he plays an average joe whose only uncertainty is that he doesn't want to sell a boat that can be cut in half and displayed in a wall. Jake's unerring eye for honesty and his confidence builds for a rather superficial role for Cusack.

"Must Love Dogs" was written by Gary David Goldberg, an executive producer and writer of TV shows such as "M*A*S*H," "Family Ties" and "Spin City." Unfortunately, he's also responsible for the unashamedly (and thickly) sentimental "Dad" (I can't think of another movie that was as purely puerile in its emotional states as that one) and the movie that reads and feels and sounds like a commercial sitcom with commercial tie-ins, "Bye Bye Love." "Must Love Dogs" is not as teeth chattering as those, but certainly doesn't evoke the wit and polish of his TV classics.

This movie is strictly by-the-numbers in every department. There is the gay best friend, the family sing-along (in this case, "The Partridge Family" theme), the Meet Cute scenes, the obligatory dim-witted blonde bimbo, etc. There is no surprise, no depth of emotion, no real risks, and any movie that stars John Cusack and Diane Lane should require all three. It doesn't say much for such good actors when the high point is their searching for condoms - that shouldn't be the highlight of a teen comedy.

You must really, really, really love any kind of romantic comedy to love this movie. For a purely soft, harmless safe bet, "Must Love Dogs" may be enough. For myself, I'll stick with risk-takers like "Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind." Even Lloyd Dobler would prefer the latter.

Breaking the Walls of a Small Town

DOGVILLE (2003)

Reviewed by Jerry Saravia

(Originally reviewed in 2004)

Ten Best Films of the 2000's

"Dogville" is a masterpiece of theatre, and intrinsically flawed cinematically. How can a film be both things? Well, consider that this is the avant-garde work of Danish director Lars von Trier, who made one of my favorite films of the 1990's, "Breaking the Waves." He is the creator of Dogme95, a group of directors who use found locations, shoot on hand-held video, and so on. "Dogville" fits the bill to a tee. It is as experimental as one can imagine, as any film can be, but its theatrical staging limits its goals. Still, despite some flaws, this is a remarkable achievement and a near-masterful morality tale as only von Trier can make.

The town is Dogville, a Rocky Mountains hamlet so hidden from the world that it only has one major road to get there, Elm Street. There are fifteen denizens in this town, including a retired doctor (Philip Baker Hall) who's also a hypochondriac, a blind man (Ben Gazzara) who loves to talk about sunlight and shadows, and the town's lone sexpot (Chloe Sevigny). The most significant character is Tom (Paul Bettany), a would-be writer who holds town meetings to discuss the "goodness" of people. Into this sleepy hamlet comes Grace (Nicole Kidman), a woman on the run from gangsters. Tom takes her in because he likes her and doesn't want her to climb the surface of a mountain to escape. Tom persuades the townspeople to accept Grace and use their innate goodness to give her a chance. They give her two weeks - if they like her, she can stay. If not, she better buy some good shoes and climb that damn mountain. Grace offers to help the townspeople - they are reluctant at first, but then she starts getting paid for unnecessary work. All is fine and dandy until the police come into town looking for Grace, who may be a bank robber. Is she a simple bank robber who's holding some stash somewhere, or is she more dangerous than the people of Dogville might have thought?

As I mentioned earlier, Lars von Trier could never make a straightforward film without indulging in stylistic strokes. The difference is that, this time, von Trier has taken his Dogme rules and relied on a simple set. As evidenced by the opening overhead shot, we notice that this is simply a soundstage with chalk outlines of character names and streets (even a chalk-outlined dog named Moses). There are no visible doors or walls - the chalk outlines are the only geographical indicators of this town. Even a small rock formation stands in for a mountain. We do see a real car, a real bench, some real beds, and a wall that stands in for the window display of a small shop. Outside of that, one has to suspend disbelief and assume that this is a real town. The problem is that it obviously resembles a theatrical setting where a play is about to transpire. I admire von Trier for taking this big a step but it limits and robs us of any real visual images (even Ingmar Bergman's "After the Rehearsal," which used sets, was never this stagy). There are only three striking images in the film. One is of Grace in a truck from an overhead angle as she sleeps while we see her through a transparent tarp. The other is the introduction of Grace at night as she walks calmly down the road while everyone sleeps. Lastly, I love the use of overhead shots in general, though von Trier doesn't allow for more inventive camera set-ups.

Such theatrical staginess, though, doesn't diminish the story - in some ways, it enhances it. This is strange because I just said that, visually, the film fails to work as a visual poem. Yet the story and characters emerge so clearly and provocatively that I didn't mind too much. The reason I give it more credit is because I expect von Trier to do something like this. Other directors might have failed where von Trier succeeds admirably.

The most powerful performance is clearly Nicole Kidman's, the most adventurous actress of our generation. She evokes the fragile, human, emotional side of Grace so well that we can't help but adore her. She is like a lost puppy seeking sanctuary from killers. The town of Dogville slowly embraces her, but then they abuse her, torture her, rape her, humiliate her, and then deny they are doing such wrongdoing. Kidman evokes so many layers to Grace (including a shocking character revelation) that it is easily the most brave piece of acting she has ever committed to film.

I also admire Paul Bettany as the intellectual Tom who falls in love with Grace. Tom's dilemma begins to stifle him - does he love the townspeople more than Grace or vice versa? If the townspeople want to do away with Grace, will he be on their side or is he on Grace's side? Bettany is so good at camouflaging what the character might really be thinking that he'll keep you in suspense as to his inevitable decision.

The rest of the cast is also excellent, including Lauren Bacall, who is feisty over her gooseberry bushes, Stellan Skarsgard as a sexually repressed apple orchard farmer, Jeremy Davies as a dim checkers player, Patricia Clarkson as a mousy, strict mother who is fiercely protective of her children, and James Caan as a mob boss, among others.

"Dogville" is compelling and fascinating from start to finish. It is the kind of dazzling, experimental work we expect from Lars von Trier. The ending comes in huffing and puffing when it should have climaxed smoothly. Still, despite its minor faults, "Dogville" is a rare, brave, challenging work.

Frivolous God of Thunder sequel

THOR: THE DARK WORLD (2013)

Reviewed by Jerry Saravia

The "Iron Man" trilogy has rocked with imagination, thrilling action scenes but, most importantly, a rousing hero was found in the charismatic performance by Robert Downey, Jr. who had been given the chance to develop his Tony Stark. "Thor: The Dark World" is not in the same vein, heck not even in the same universe. Intermittently funny, it is mostly a yawn-inducing sequel with hardly the humor or gravitas that director Kenneth Branagh and actor Chris Hemsworth brought to the original Thor. Even the subtitle, "The Dark World," sounds like a cliche from the world of J.R.R Tolkien.

The Dark Elf Malekith (Christopher Eccleston) wants to shroud the world in darkness. Yep, you can't say you have not heard that before. Except he wants to literally shroud the world in darkness with the help of a weapon called Aether, which looks like floating spilled ink that an astronaut let loose into space. After Malekith fails to unleash the Aether in a battle sequence that looks like "Lord of the Rings" complete with amber red tones and dark gloomy skies, the spilled ink is placed in a stone column to never be found again. Yeah, right. Next we get the mighty Thor (Chris Hemsworth) wielding his hammer at a rock monster in yet another battle sequence. All is right with the universe until we learn that the Nine Realms are about to be aligned, allowing for portals on Earth. Natalie Portman returns as astrophysicist Jane Foster who discovers these portals in some abandoned factory where kids are throwing soda cans into this portal (everything disappears in this portal and lands in the world of Asgard). So far, so good. Unfortunately, Jane accidentally releases the Aether which consumes her. Naturally, we get Malekith who wants possession of it and we also get the sweet return of Loki (Tom Hiddleston), Thor's adoptive brother, whom Thor reluctantly enlists his help in fighting Malekith and locating other portals.

When "Thor: The Dark World" focuses on the bitter, bruised relationship between Thor and Loki, I was sold. When it focused on Thor and his love for Jane, I was also sold (though Portman is not half as convincing as I would hope). When we see Dr. Erik Selvig (Stellan Skarsgard), now placed in a mental institution, I was happy as can be to see the return of an eccentric character in the Marvel universe. Likewise, I was delighted to see the return of Kat Dennings as Jane's quirky intern (I still insist she should have played Jane Foster). But the movie gets bogged down in lots of flashy special-effects and far too many brightly lit shots of spaceships and rainbow colored passageways. When I see ships firing lasers at each other, I started to think I was watching "Star Wars," not Thor. The final, interminable climax has Thor and Malekith pounding each other from one portal to another - it literally gave me a headache. The movie loses sight of its characters and of the quirky humor of the original film. I also wanted to learn about Malekith who is simply an insidiously evil elf - I mean, why is this guy wanting to shroud the world in darkness? There is a hint of revenge in his plan but it is shrouded in noise and overkill.

"Thor: The Dark World" places emphasis on action over plot, explosions and razzle-dazzle over character exploration. Director Alan Taylor takes over Branagh's duties but he is not as epic a director as the Shakespearean Branagh. As far the characters are concerned, only Loki rises as the most fascinating villain in any of these movies - his acrimonious relationship with Thor and Thor's father (Anthony Hopkins) should've and could've given this movie a shot of urgency. As it stands, the movie creates a far more cardinal sin - it is boring.

Arctic air equals more sharks!

SHARKNADO 2: THE SECOND ONE (2014)

Reviewed by Jerry Saravia

"Sharknado 2: The Second One" may as well have been directed by the ZAZ (Jerry Zucker, Jim Abrahams, David Zucker) comedy team - it is suffused with lots of jokes though the comic timing is frequently off. It is meant to be a bad movie, a fitfully enjoyable one at that but a bad movie on purpose. It is ten times better than the original SyFy hit that had more lulls than Tara Reid's horrendous line readings - it is stupider, zanier and damn right insanely over-the-top.

Not much of a plot here. Ian Ziering and Tara Reid are Fin and April, the divorced couple from the original, who are on a booking tour for a best-selling book April wrote called "How to Survive a Sharknado." While on a plane trip, a sharknado occurs and sharks burst through the plane and kill pilots, passengers and stewardesses, including a sweet cameo by purple-haired Kelly Osbourne. Fin lands the plane safely in New York City where they hope to meet their relatives. But no sooner before one can say, "Jump the Shark!" (an actual line of dialogue in the film), Fin gets in action-hero mode and straps on a chainsaw ready to kill the sharks who are steadily approaching the Big Apple in not one but two tornados! God forbid if those two tornados clash into the Empire State Building which amazingly, through the sheer act of magical intuition, Fin figures out and decides to...well, see the movie and you will see how the film literally jumps the shark.

"Sharknado 2" has a plethora of cinematic in-jokes from "Star Wars," "Kill Bill," "Airplane!" (Robert Hays cameo included), James Bond and various cameos from Judd Hirsch doing a semi-reprise of his "Taxi" character, to Wil Wheaton and Perez Hilton and the hosts of "Live with Kelly and Michael," to Matt Lauer and Al Roker playing it very straight from the "Today" set as they do a running commentary on sharknados, apparently being pushed by arctic air (Global Warming, much?). There a host of other cameos but Hirsch and Lauer and Roker rock the boat.

Crazier, loopier, dumber than people who film actual tornados in the Midwest, and full proof that Tara Reid cannot carry a line of dialogue with much conviction, "Sharknado 2" is not for cineastes or even B-movie lovers. It is for lovers of Z cinema, the lowest of lows of cinematic crudity. Decapitations and amputations litter the screen (including the Statue of Liberty's head, more thrillingly executed in "Cloverfield" but, hey, that one is a B movie) and bad special-effects rule the day. Ziering seems to love killing sharks and Tara packs a saw in a bit cribbed from "Grindhouse," which may been cribbed from exploitation films of the 70's. There are still some lulls and not quite as many angry sharks as I had hoped (though there is a subliminal hark back to "Jaws the Revenge" involving April that made me laugh) but I can't hate a movie where Fin proposes to April with a ring still found in the...well, it is priceless and inspired.