Stealing Huggies and a Junior baby

 RAISING ARIZONA (1987)

Reassessment by Jerry Saravia

The Coen Brothers' first foray into the film world was 1984's "Blood Simple," one of the most astonishing debuts by any writer-director or, in this case, the writer-director brother team known as the Coens. Following that noir splash of Hitchcockian levels came "Raising Arizona," an insanely high-pitched, cartoonish carnival of a road movie to nowhere. It is one of those films I decided to reassess since I never quite cared for it back in 1987. Today, it seems juiced up and memorably irreverent to be sure, but nothing in it connects me to its outlandish material. It is a complete original, I will say that.

Hi is the Nicolas Cage character, a repeat criminal offender who robs a convenience store each time and serves an eight to nine month prison term. Each time he gets out promising to a parole board that he will improve his life, and each time he winds up right back in the slammer. And each time, he meets a police booking officer named Ed (Holly Hunter) who takes his mugshot. A relationship is developing as he is smitten with her and before you can even get to the romance, they get hitched. Hi tries to go straight working at a machine shop, and eventually the couple move into a trailer park. Ed can't have kids due to being infertile and adoption is out of the question thanks to Hi's numerous arrests. What else can be done other than kidnapping one of the quintuplets from a furniture magnate king named Nathan Arizona (the name of his furniture chain is "Unpainted Arizona") Hi gets a ladder to the Arizona residence and gets a baby, why none other than Nathan, Jr. 

"Raising Arizona" could have developed along the lines of a deviant family trying to raise a child without raising eyebrows. Well, raising eyebrows they do from Hi's former jail buddies Evelle and Gale Snopes (child-like William Forsythe and screaming-like-a-howling-dog John Goodman) who emerge from a prison escape underneath a muddy terrain in scenes that looked like they may have inspired 1994's "The Shawshank Redemption." There's also the kookier-than-thou couple, Glen (Sam McMurray) who is Hi's boss, and his wife Dot (Frances McDormand) and their insane, unruly group of kids who practically destroy Hi's small mobile home. Glen suggests that they swap wives, a little swinging Arizona thing. These scenes are among the worst in the film, cringe-inducing and pathetically unfunny. I might have preferred if this excruciating couple was excised from the film completely. 

So "Raising Arizona" has babies crawling out of cribs, babies left in car seats in the middle of the road, a destructive motorcyclist and possibly bail-bondsman from Hell, lots of robbing Huggies from stores, an insane number of car and foot chases and one hilarious supermarket scene involving a police shootout and women running with their carts down the aisles. Nothing in this movie makes a lick of sense and the absurdist humor runs hot and cold - I occasionally laughed but most of the time, I felt disconnected from the experience. The movie is a barrage of absurdist episodes yet they never quite fit into a whole - they just meander. 

Still, the Coens have always proven to be the most original, inventive filmmakers with a visual bravado of shots that fly by with acute timing and are so perfectly composed that you can't help but smile (the shots of the car stopping just short of a few inches from a baby car seat on the road will leave you breathless). I also love the close-ups of the soiled biker from Hell as he smokes his cigar - he is so cartoonish in tone and style that you know he would not be out of place in a Road Runner cartoon. "Raising Arizona" is never boring, though it does meander, and most of it seems pointless yet has some energetic, colorful moments that will hit you like a ton of bricks. I call it zany silliness at best.    

Blockbuster Girl

 CAPTAIN MARVEL (2019)

Reviewed by Jerry Saravia 

"Captain Marvel" is mid-level superhero fun and games - neither extraordinary nor dumb. Just somewhere in the middle as an adequate effort that makes one wish it was so much more. 

Right at the opening, it was hard to be enthusiastic from the numerous visual and special-effects in another galaxy that looked no different than "Guardians of the Galaxy." We see Brie Larson and Jude Law engaged in hand-to-hand combat and Law has the upper hand. She tries to pick herself up again and is warned not to use her emotions, such as anger, or resort to humor to fight. Gee, pretty much old-hat "Star Wars" philosophizing and, if I didn't know better, I almost felt I was watching a Star Wars movie. Actually it is more like Starforce Wars with Larson as Vers, a Starforce recruit and Kree member and Law plays her mentor, Yon-Rogg (there is no way in hell I can remember those names). The planet is Hala (inhabited by the Krees) and the alleged villains are Skrulls, an alien shapeshifting race. Nothing that transpires here was particularly new or fresh to my eyes, not even a woman able to fight and shoot aliens (oh, yes, Virginia, this has been a long standing staple of sci-fi and comic-book stuff for eons). The color green is fairly prominent here and it gave me "Green Lantern" vibes. 

So the Skrulls capture Vers and probe her mind, skipping past many of her memories to locate a certain Mar-Vell (known as Dr. Lawson on Earth and excitingly played by Annette Bening). Before long, Vers escapes and lands on Earth as she crash lands on a Blockbuster video store! It is 1995 and she eventually meets up with a young Nick Fury minus an eyepatch (a de-aged Samuel L. Jackson). There is much fiery action on Earth and, after a while, Vers discovers her own true identity.

"Captain Marvel" is competently made and I like Larson in the title role but I didn't love her work here. She is fine and pulls it off admirably enough yet her few dramatic, revelatory moments don't have enough punch. There is more of a dramatic pull from her memories that we see frequently, as a kick-ass Air Force pilot and her sharing of laughs and family time with her best friend and fellow Air Force pilot, Maria Rambeau (a divine Lashana Lynch). There are small splashes of humor from Larson's superheroine that I enjoyed and it is nice to see Larson break free a little from the confines of most other stalwart superheroes. 

Samuel L. Jackson's Fury and a golden cat, which is much more than it seems, give the film some measure of variety and a sense of fun. Ben Mendelsohn is terrifically engaging as a Skrull who shows he's not quite the villain he appears to be. I just wish there was more of a sense of joy to Larson's performance to really kick it up a few notches. Or maybe she just has nothing left to prove to us. 

I Just Don't Care

 U.S. MARSHALS (1998)
Reviewed by Jerry Saravia

If you are going to cast Tommy Lee Jones in a movie, especially as Sam Gerard (the U.S. Marshal who went after Harrison Ford's Dr. Kimble in "The Fugitive") then give him ample opportunity to relish the role with humor and gravitas. "U.S. Marshals" is a nondescript, slavishly mediocre action movie that might have satisfied anyone who never saw "The Fugitive." Jones is certainly up to the task but it doesn't seem sufficient to hold this movie together. This is not a recommendation.

Jones as Gerard is now in pursuit of an ex-government agent (Wesley Snipes) who killed two federal agents in an underground parking garage with either his bare hands or he shot them (the movie never quite makes that clear). There is no doubt that Snipes' character killed them yet he claims self-defense (the blurry surveillance video looks about as clear as pixelated footage of missiles firing targets from the Gulf War). Gerard never once has any doubt that Snipes is guilty so the tension of the cat-and-mouse game that was so thrilling in "The Fugitive" is lost here. 

"U.S. Marshals" has extraneous supporting characters including the lovely Irene Jacob ("The Double Life of Veronique") whose role here as Snipes' girlfriend is the very definition of thankless. So is Kate Nelligan as Gerard's boss and possibly ex-lover. Robert Downey Jr. is efficient as an agent assigned to the case though you know he is dirty from the first scene onwards. The Marshals team is far more colorful though they have too few humorous interactions with Gerard. We are saddled with Snipes hiding out in swampy waters, apartment dwellings, and running consistently including an unbelievable stunt where he lands on an elevated subway car from a rooftop that not even Jackie Chan could accomplish. The plane crash at the beginning is something to see yet it just stands out as an elaborate special-effect.

"U.S. Marshals" is overlong, overstuffed and difficult to care about. When it's over, you'll long to go back and see "The Fugitive" all over again.     

Priest as typical Schrader loner

 FIRST REFORMED (2017)

Reviewed by Jerry Saravia

A priest who struggles to maintain faith in a world where it barely manifests, maybe only rarely surfaces, is a subject I always had a vested interest in. Writer-director Paul Schrader is the man who understands religion as faith and the difficulty of having beliefs teetering on a vulnerable clothesline. "First Reformed" is that faith healer type of story, though it segues into semi-familiar Schrader territory where potential violence is the solution. 

Ethan Hawke is ideally cast as Reverend Toller, a priest who tends to a rather small Dutch Reformed church in Snowbridge, Albany, NY. The church itself is a tourist attraction where Toller explains to the few who enter about its history in the area, especially being a stop during the Underground Railroad days. He doesn't seem to get many followers at this church, other than the neighboring mega church known as Abundant Life. Toller is seemingly the classic Schrader loner, always writing in his journal about his daily activities and spiritual thoughts. He gets special attention from one parishioner, a Mary Mensana (a highly effective turn by Amanda Seyfried), who wants Toller to visit her troubled husband, a radical environmentalist who is deeply aware of the climate crisis we face. Toller counsels him, trying to spread some shred of optimism, ensuring him that doom and gloom is not all there is.

"First Reformed" is a most curious character study by Schrader, and it is never clear where Toller's mind goes. A priest who has reformed himself from his dark past has valid questions about the church and its place in the world of deep faith. The Dutch Reformed church has precious little attendance, yet the Abundant Life church has many donors and is it a fulfilling holy place or one that only preaches something it doesn't practice? Toller starts to question his faith only in terms of what good it really does for anyone. He becomes close to Mary and their intimacy, after her husband commits suicide, is strong. Does Toller start to believe in Mary's husband and his own belief system in the rotten climate deniers of the world? Can the world be a better place if we get rid of segments of the population who don't have our best interests at heart?

"First Reformed" asks deep philosophical questions yet I did not buy Toller's abrupt change towards the end - I did not sense enough buildup for such a holy man to partake in a drastic move. Still, despite an unsatisfying change of heart in Toller, Schrader's "First Reformed" should not be ignored. Often powerful and simply, lucidly told, recalling the religious works and tone of Carl Dreyer and Ingmar Bergman in their religious pictures, "First Reformed" is also further proof of the strong, vital Ethan Hawke who is one of the few actors of the last two decades making challenging works of cinema. I pray he and Schrader continue their well-chosen paths. 

ZZZZ-slithering on the screen

 SNAKES ON A PLANE (2006)
Endured by Jerry Saravia

"Snakes on a Plane" is a torturous test of endurance, the kind of movie that makes you hate cinema for allowing B-movies of this kind to exist. I don't object to the central idea summed up beautifully in a blunt title, but I do object to the movie's tedium and over-the-top gore supplied by largely CGI-enhanced snakes. That...and a title song video that plays next to the end credits. Ugh.

The movie begins with a couple of thrilling surfing shots, followed by a motorbike travelling at top speeds from an overhead shot that goes on forever. So far, not bad and this is about as thrilling as "Snakes on a Plane" gets. There's Samuel L. Jackson as a top-of-the-line FBI agent who rescues a young surfer from imminent death - the kid was a witness to the vicious murder of a prosecutor by some Asian mob leader. Now the kid is in danger after getting shot at in his home and is due to travel by plane to L.A. to testify against this kingpin, escorted by Jackson and another FBI agent. It turns out that the kingpin's minions have loaded a cargo of illegal, deadly cobras and other snakes from around the world. There is a time-release trap door that lets them loose all over the plane and they start hissing and biting any and every passenger on board. An anonymous couple have sex in the bathroom and a snake drops in and on them. Another snake worms its way through the inside of a woman's clothes as she sleeps, and clearly she thinks something else is happening. Holy sexual innuendos! Before long, Samuel L. Jackson utters his trademark ubiquitous one-liner that was made famous from the trailers, and I was ready to check out and have a nap.

"Snakes on a Plane" could have been an infectious B-movie but it is a grating chore to sit through. The movie begins on overdrive and I was sort of into it, until they got into the plane. Sure, there are enough cobras of every variety to scare the pants off of Indiana Jones but I was not amazed, thrilled or scared by any of the slithering, poisonous creatures - mostly just nauseated. The snakes slither through the screen like props and there is not much suspense either - we see them coming, the victims don't see them, and then the attack happens. One woman's eye socket is penetrated by a snake and another one crushes a man to death. The latter victim is some arrogant businessman who thinks nothing of throwing a woman's chihuahua at the snakes to stop them from advancing. I did not feel for that crappy businessman afterwards.

It is fun seeing Kenan Thompson as a rapper's bodyguard who turns out to have flying experience thanks to video games, but it is gravely disappointing to see Samuel L. Jackson running around without saying anything memorable (the search in the cargo hold to turn on the plane's refrigeration system back on is right out of "Jurassic Park," which also starred Sam the Man). If Jackson is indifferent to the chaos and if we see that Julianna Margulies is left on the screen to be nothing more than the comforting airline attendant, then it is no surprise how empty-headed and indifferent one will feel watching it. "Snakes on a Plane" was a massive Internet phenomenon but so was "The Blair Witch Project" and which one do you think I prefer?

Old-fashioned with purple tights

 THE PHANTOM (1996)

Reviewed by Jerry Saravia

I used to read the Phantom comics back in my native Uruguay every weekend. My grandfather was also a fan and read the comic in our newspaper, always mentioning this hero with extreme delight. I was always excited by this masked hero and his jungle exploits, and what kid wouldn't be. Watching 1996's "The Phantom" put me right back in the mindframe of an excited 6 year-old and what is most exciting about "The Phantom" isn't just its rousing titular hero - it is that is unashamed in showing us dastardly villains, some pirates in a lair that could easily be right out of "The Goonies" and a few exotic dames (including an early role for Catherine Zeta-Jones) as an extra bonus. "The Phantom" is just pure old-fashioned fun with its old-fashioned heart in the right place.

Billy Zane is our masked, purple-tights hero, the Phantom aka Kit Walker who lives in his fortress of solitude somewhere in Bengalla. There is also Xander Trax (Treat Williams who is delightfully evil, reminding one of Timothy Dalton's similarly devious role in "The Rocketeer"), a tycoon who believes any and anyone can be bought. Well, of course, welcome to woeful capitalism in the years following the Great Depression. He wants possession of three Phantom skulls that when combined, well, you know with great power comes great villainy. It later turns out that three skulls are not enough but why carp over cracked skulls mythology. The Phantom himself knows more than Trax about that power which largely emits deadly lasers. Why do these unimaginative powerful villains always think of artifacts in terms of advanced weaponry and nothing else? 

That's about the only real question this movie never answers. But I don't go to see pulpy adventure tales like "The Phantom" for philosophical questions - I go for escapist fun and adventure in serial-esque fashion. From director Simon Wincer, he acquits himself beautifully with some rousing action scenes including the Phantom running from bad guys by springing on top of taxis to finally setting afoot at the local zoo where he pets a tiger. There is also a terrific elevator scene that is almost on par with the claustrophobic thrills of the first "Die Hard" movie. Need I forget to mention a truck holding a child rescued by the Phantom as they are dangling on top of a collapsing rope bridge? How about a seaplane where the Phantom rescues his ex-girlfriend, Diana Palmer (Kristy Swanson), as they are ready to jump off onto his white horse named Hero? Of course, evading villains no matter what mode of transportation is never enough when they just happen to find you. Yep, it is that kind of movie.

"The Phantom" is smoothly directed by Simon Wincer with just enough finesse to make one giddy with the movie's many thrilling action setpieces. There is also sufficiently sly humor by the late screenwriter Jeffrey Boam ("Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade," "Lethal Weapon 2") to make this more than a worthwhile pulp effort. Pulpy all the way, in production design and in its authentic 1930's flavor with a hero who has an insatiable appetite for getting into trouble and two dames who know how to fight back, "The Phantom" is not a great movie but it is a superbly fun time at the movies. You just might pinch yourself at the end. 

Loving You Tender, Tuesday

 HEARTBREAK HOTEL (1988)

Reminiscence by Jerry Saravia

My father was an absolute diehard Elvis Presley fan. He loved Elvis as much as any other rock and roll singer, and there are legions that can say the same thing. My father was born in 1942 so Elvis became a big sensation even in our native born country of Uruguay. He also used to own several original Elvis LP's but couldn't bring most of them when we moved to Canada in the 1970's. Anything Elvis-related he saw, that included all Elvis movies including the ones that he knew failed. My recollection in the 1980's is that we saw "This is Elvis" twice in theaters - an essential documentary for any fans of the King (and he did not know at the time that many scenes were flawlessly recreated). However, my fondest memory of seeing an Elvis movie with my father is one that didn't star the King at all. It is the campy, glossy, fictional fairy-tale known as "Heartbreak Hotel." 

Sure, it is pretty much a one-joke movie with a superb premise that is never truly fully realized. Sideburns Elvis in 1972 (well-played by David Keith, though not bearing much of the King's likeness) is kidnapped by some teenage kids and one of them, Johnny Wolfe (Charlie Schlatter), is a wannabe rock and roller who doesn't care for the King's music or swagger. Johnny kidnapped Elvis to keep his mom happy who is dating guys of low repute (the mother, often bathed in golden hues, is played by a vibrant Tuesday Weld who actually appeared in one Elvis flick, "Wild in the Country"). Lo and behold, Elvis is upset after he wakes up and discovers what has happened but then goes along with Johnny's plan. Johnny still finds little of Elvis relevant to his world. Johnny's mother, Marie, adores Elvis and so does Marie's young daughter (Angela Goethals) who doesn't want to turn off her nightlight. Can Elvis convince the young girl to turn off her nightlight? Can Elvis make Marie's dreams of having him live in her Flaming Star hotel? Can Elvis teach Johnny some tight pelvis moves on stage? Will there be a fight in a cafe with a jukebox that imitates a classic scene from "Loving You"?  And where else in the history of Elvis will you find Elvis actually mowing the lawn!

The movie is nothing spectacular, simply a sweet little fairy-tale of the "what if?" variety. The script and direction by Chris Columbus is a little flat, though I did love the final shot of fog rushing by as Elvis boards his plane. It is something out of an adolescent's dream taken out of a teenager's scrapbook and, on that level, it works (that shot, incidentally, reminded me of "La Bamba" when Buddy Holly, the Big Bopper and Ritchie Valens took off on that ill-fated plane ride). I am sure my father is smiling knowing I remember this slightly bizarre theatrical experience. All hail the King!